The Plan
by Adventure Span
Summary: With the help of his friends, Jean will follow a plan to make Mikasa fall for him once in for all. What will he do? Will he succeed? Will Mikasa finally see him as someone better? Will he become someone better?
1. The Promise

The** Plan By Adventure Span.**

On that particular evening, Marco was late for dinner. The training session of that day had blistered his hands and it had almost taken an hour to bandage them.

Holding his dishes awkwardly, he went inside the cafeteria to peacefully enjoy his meal but as soon as he entered, he saw that a lot of trainees were standing up in the middle of the place, yelling at each other and seemingly engaging in heated arguments. Everyone was gesturing with their arms.

_God, I hope no one starts a fight._

He quickly sat at his usual table. In front of him, Jean was showing a very frustrated expression while eating his soup.

Marco smiled at him.

"What's happening over here?"

Jean let out a grunt.

"Jaeger is going at it again."

Marco glared at the center of the cafeteria and saw Eren. His voice was the strongest and it sounded all throughout the place.

"_It's our turn to make a difference!" "Hell no, Eren! The best we can do is to keep the walls safe!" "We won't be able to do that for much longer if we don't act! We have to be decisive!"_

"Again with that? He does not seem to get bored of it."

Marco then looked at his friend with a small smile.

"You've got to give it to him though."

Jean's eyes narrowed as they darted towards Eren.

"Look how he's holding that smug face up in the air, like he's god almighty or something."

"_We will begin a new era of happiness for all humanity with no more titans and we will…"_

"Yeah, I cannot stand it anymore. I assure you Marco; blood will come out of my ears if this keeps going."

Jean's eyes quckly moved towards someone of much more interest to him. Marco noticed Jean's sudden eye movment and was not surprised when he confirmed who was the person that was captivating Jean's attention.

At the other side of the cafeteria, Mikasa was sitting all alone at a table and was looking at the outside from the window. Her usual emotionless expression visible on her face.

Marco grinned at Jean.

"It seems like Mikasa is looking really nice today, don't you think?"

Jean sighed profoundly, not embarrassed at all by Marco's teasing.

"Look at her, she does not even seem to be listening to our 'savior's´ speech."

Jean returned his glare towards Mikasa.

"I would even say she even looks … slightly bored."

Marco smiled.

"So what are you waiting for? Tonight can be finally your chance…"

He knew his friend very well. Perhaps Jean would refuse to talk to her, but Marco was certain that this time Jean's pride would win over his rational mind that feared embarrassment.

Jean tightened his expression, folded his arms and closed his eyes.

"Alright, let's see…"

He cleared his throat.

"Now that she is alone I can go to her table and maybe ask her a few things about her life. I could also tease Eren and his unprecedented heroism. That will surely get her laughing."

Jean gave Mikasa a last contemplating look and took a big breath.

"Alright then, here I go!"

"Good luck smooth talker!"

Jean stood up and began walking, slightly annoyed by his friend's remark.

Despite his best efforts to prevent it from showing, he was clearly uptight. He did think about Mikasa quite a lot in his regular days and especially at lonely nights before falling asleep; he didn't want to mess it up with her.

He kept walking normally to other side of the cafeteria, but for him it seemed like he was taking steps in slow motion. He also was feeling some wetness in his face. Perhaps he was a little more nervous than he had first thought. Perhaps it had been a bad idea to go talk to her.

_I am not doubting myself, am I? _

While on his way to Mikasa's table, Eren's voice could be heard clearly.

"_As the Survey Corps we will retake the cities we've lost and…"_

_Oh god damn it Jaeger, shut up! Don't you see I'm trying to focus here!_

"_We'll make sure every human has food from the new land we'll…"_

He could feel his heart racing. He also acknowledged that the wetness on his face was, in fact, cold sweat.

Perhaps he was _a lot_ more nervous than he had first thought and Eren was not helping him one bit. Perhaps it had been a very bad idea. He kept walking none the less; it was too late to back down now.

_All right, I got this! A few more steps forward and I'll just casually start a conversation. She's bored after all… and I would not blame her… five more steps and I'm there…_

He finally took those steps. He was standing, with hands sweating, at the edge of Mikasa's table. He looked directly at her and happily remembered that every day, when by just mere chance her eyes happened to meet hers, he felt something tightened inside of his stomach and twitching of every muscle of his body.

He would never allow himself to show it, but each time their glare connected, it was taking a lot of him to hide those twitchy feelings from everyone. He really wondered why Mikasa had that effect on him.

He did not know if those stressing and uncomfortable emotions were signs love.

_It is probably her hair that just hypnotizes me into stupidity._

But he definitely wanted to find out exactly what those emotions were.

_You look so beautiful tonight; I'll definitely make you my girlfriend!_

A few seconds passed with him staring at her with a small, weak smile. She did not notice him at all.

_Is the window that interesting Mikasa?_

He sighed.

_Alright, here I go! _

He put on his face the best expression he could muster, took a gigantic breath and opened his mouth to speak. He could feel the first syllables coming out his mouth when…

"_AND MIKASA WILL JOIN ME IN TAKING OUR LANDS BACK FROM THE TITANS, WON'T YOU MIKASA?!" _

Jean was frozen on the spot.

Eren had his war face on and was pointing at her with his finger. All the attention of the room was now on the black haired woman. Jean could not believe what he had just heard. And worse, his god damn throat would not give him any words.

Mikasa looked at Eren and the recruits.

"Yes, I will be joining him in whatever endeavor he chooses to take on."

Jean's heart broke in two.

And his face went from a semi-confident grin to an incredibly sad grimace to finally form an incredibly furious expression.

After Mikasa's answer, Eren quickly continued with his debates and the attention was off her.

"_See, I told you I was not a crazy loner, a lot of people will help us." "No way Eren!" "You got to trust all of humanity, not only me!"_

Jean turned his face back to look at Eren with a deep, very, very deep contempt. He clenched his jaw and tightened his fist so much his knuckles turned white. He was so amazingly angry he forgot he was standing right next to the girl he liked.

_That's it Jaeger, you insane bastard! Tomorrow while training, when you are not looking, I will shoot a three dimensional gear hook right up your…_

He suddenly _remembered _where he was standing with a slight gasp. He turned his face slowly and his eyes were met by the big, grey eyes of Mikasa. He blushed very slightly.

"…ehh…"

_Damn it, think of something! _

Her eyes felt to him like daggers on his chest, and it was worsened by the fact that she was not showing any emotion at all in her glare.

"…I"

He put his hand on the back on his head.

"Eh… T-the noodles in my soup tasted really bad… and I was w-wondering if yours tasted alright…?"

He put up a weak smile and used all the strength he could muster to keep eye contact. She did not answer.

She just kept staring. This was really starting to feel like torture to Jean.

_For god's sake… noodles?! What the hell was I thinking?!_

Regardless of his anger over his complete lack of conversational creativity, he managed somehow to keep his weak smile on, although he did not know for how much longer he would be able to. His body would betray him anytime soon.

A few more seconds passed. Heart pounding, Jean was about to break down emotionally when finally…

"My noodles seemed fine."

Her expression did not change.

"Oh… awesome… that is great…s-so… keep enjoying your dinner..."

He gave her a last smile and turned back towards his table without hearing a reply.

Marco smiled at him when he finally sat at the table.

"That was short… how did-"

The reply that came from Jean was a frustrated grunt.

Marco really wanted to cheer his friend up a little, but knew it was best for now to leave it alone. The tension in Jean's body told him that. He would definitely get to it later tonight.

Jean did not look at Mikasa for the rest of dinner but luckily for his sanity, Eren had stopped speaking.

-x-

That very same night, on the outside of the sleeping cabin, Marco approached his friend who was standing near some trees with his hands folded across his chest and was looking like the he could erode his teeth from the tightness of his face.

"You don't have to be this obvious, you know…"

Jean did not answer. He just looked down with shame. He let out a long grunt.

"Jean, being mad at him will not make you get her."

"Please Marco, just leave me alone."

His face turned to one of sadness.

"I just want to think things up, that is all."

"Don't tell me you are like this because of a girl, do you like her that much?"

"It is not just about her."

He lowered his voice into a whisper.

"What did that beautiful, smart and awesome girl saw in him that I don't have? Suicidal intentions, childishness, stubbornness, god damn near craziness…!? "

Marco looked at him serenely.

"I don't like what he is planning to do with his life either but… If I'm being honest to you, he does in fact look like he could risk it all in order to accomplish what he wants. You and I on the other hand are more … normal…yeah, normal people and as such we don't have those… impulsive behaviors."

Jean's anger worsened at those words. It was as if he'd been waiting for them. He looked at his friend with fire in his eyes.

"So we are cowards then!? People who are scum just because we do not sacrifice ourselves!? Cowards because we do not want to die!?"

Jean's voice grew louder. Marco also noticed some sort of profound emotion was taking over his friend.

"That is _exactly _what has been going through my mind that makes me so god damn angry! I know we are not cowards! Damn it, I know it! But everyone just keeps looking up at him like he's some hero and our instructors also hate me for trying to live just in peace and -"

"Jean…"

The serenity on Marco's tone calmed his friend.

_Passion, my friend. That's the emotion that has taken over you._

"To me you are the bravest person in the world for admitting your desires with honesty. Even more so for doing it in front of others and I think…"

"Please don't."

Jean looked down once more with a very deep frown. Marco opened his mouth to continue regardless, but was stopped by his friend once more.

"Thanks for everything Marco, but please don't."

"What do you mean ?"

"Please don't tell that we just have to be fine with being who we are! And that perhaps Mikasa made the right choice in being with Eren because she is just as crazy as he is…"

"You never seemed to me like someone who cared too much about the opinion of others."

"The thing is…they might just have a point. I'm most probably a coward…"

His voice crackled.

"And I hate that fact so much!"

Jean lowered his voice into a whisper again.

"But I do not want to get killed..."

And he started sniffing.

Marco looked very carefully at his friend and smiled. He knew exactly what would be the right thing to say. Something had gone off in his head. Instead of that telling him he was alright as he was, he chose to do something so much better. Something that would get his friend out of this mess.

_Hope is the right thing for you, Jean_.

"I agree with you, they may have a point. However, even if we are not suicidal, that does not mean we can't show everyone how _passionate and courageous_ we _can_ be if we want to!"

Jean snapped his head up at Marco.

"Let me tell you what Jean, I have an idea. We'll just have to figure out a way."

"A way?"

"A way to get Mikasa to fall for you. An amazing way that will make her see how brave you _can actually be!_"

_You might see it yourself as well, my friend._

Marco's optimism stepped up a notch and his already big smile broadened.

"She will see that regular people are the bravest and will definitely quit being around Eren..."

Jean was now perked.

"...and I will be helping you all the way! I have something to prove too Jean! I'll prove to the world that I can be as just courageous as you!"

Marco grabbed his friend by the shoulders.

"So what do you say?"

Jean smiled weakly.

"Crazy talk you are giving me here, Marco. I really didn't think you could get me out of this mood."

He laughed softly. Jean was still a little shaken.

"You really like Mikasa that much, don't you?"

"I do… Every time I see her my heart seems to stop and I feel just like… Oh shut up!"

Marco now was laughing uncontrollably at his best friend who was blushing like crazy.

_Jean actually said that silly romantic thing!_

"Alright, I'll stop laughing... haha...I'll stop laughing right now...hahaha."

He didn't stop.

Jean now got semi serious and broadened his smile in spite of his blush.

"Yeah, yeah, I like her a lot, lets just leave it at that. And there is no way she'll stay with Eren if I can help it."

Marco stopped laughing and looked at his friend with an enormous smile.

"So that means we'll do it?"

Jean grinned.

"Yeah, I promise we will. Have you got any plans?"

-x-


	2. The Speed Race

Chapter 2

Jean let out an enormous sigh when he sat at his table the next morning.

"Alright Marco, what do you got?"

"I think I have a good plan that might just work." Marco said while finishing his breakfast.

He then left his spoon on the table, intertwined his fingers and started explaining his rationale.

"So girls like brave and strong boys, right Jean?"

"Right."

"So if we assume that fact is true, then Mikasa _must think_ Eren is very brave and very strong. More than you at least, right?"

Jean glared at his friend showing some anger in his eyes.

"Right"

Jean grunted, closing his eyes.

"That is probably what it happening."

"So then, the answer is very simple Jean…"

He grabbed his friend's shoulder.

"You will have show your incredible bravery and strength in training! And you'll have to do it in front of Mikasa! You'll have to blow her mind with your speed, combat abilities and tactical mind!"

Jean had never heard someone so optimistic in his life. He still had his doubts though.

"And how I am supposed to do that? Mikasa always beats everybody in everything. She _is _that awesome…"

Marco grinned mischievously.

"True, Mikasa is definitely top of the class at pretty much everything. But you are forgetting one of the most important events coming up this year."

Jean looked at his friend with slight confusion.

"Listen Jean, I'll make sure you are top time at the three dimensional gear speed race in the forest." Marco mockingly made an evil laugh.

"You mean be the fastest in_ the_ "Speed Race" that is happening in two days?"

"Yes, that one"

Marco dropped the hand from Jean's shoulder and began searching his pockets…

The exercise is well known by all recruits, even from the first day of training. Officially it is called by the instructor cadre the "Test in proficiency of motion and control of speed-balance in maneuvers of three dimensional nature around forested areas."

Unofficially, since the official name is a mouthful, it is known as the "Speed Race".

Every six months all of the recruits of the trainee squad are demanded to "run the race on time"; that is move with the three dimensional gear from one specified part of the forest to another one, and do it in less than ten minutes or they fail the test and must re do it. It was also rumored that the positions of the top ten candidates depended greatly on the results of the test. Needless to say, every race was hectic and competition was fierce.

Six months before, Mikasa had broken a previous record that had been set at the military by finishing the race at eight minutes and thirty eight seconds. Jean finished at eight minutes and fifty two seconds. This was considered as an exceptional time, but it was nowhere near Mikasa's.

"So, I'm assuming you know Mikasa holds the record… so, what clever idea do you have in mind?"

"Well... You know that the positions of start and finish of the race are changed every six months to prevent people from practicing the test beforehand, right?"

"Yeah, they do it to encourage improvisation of motion when going through the forest."

"Well… Five days ago, I accidentally overheard the instructor meeting in which the race was being planned."

Marco grinned and took out of his pocket a folded paper.

"Yeah right, _accidentally… _Like I believe you and everything…_" _

Jean smiled at his friend who let out a nervous laugh, and placed his hand behind his head.

"I've read in an old book that in love and war everything is fair..."

_And YOU are the one who teases me for being cheesy?! Also, how the hell did you manage to know where the race was being planned?! Well, thank god you are at least sharing the information with me._

Marco unfolded the paper on the table, which was a map, and started discussing his plans for Jean to perform at the event…

-x-

Jean was standing in a thin line with his teammates at the start of the racing course. A huge wall of stone stood behind them.

_The southern cliff at the forest, Marco was right._

They all had their maneuver gear ready and were waiting for the beginning. Since the course was narrow in width, only half of the trainees would run the course at that time. Marco would be running the course after them, with the other half of the trainee squadron.

Jean now looked left and saw Mikasa standing next to Eren.

"I'm going to win you over this time."

Keith Shadis began yelling.

"You have already been informed about all the details of the test, any last minute questions?!"

There was no answer.

"Alright then! Everyone get ready!"

Every trainee gripped his gear handles tightly and bent slightly at the knees. The tension could be felt in the air and silence was absolute. Only the wind could be heard at that moment.

…

…

…

"GO!"

What it seem like a wall of metal wires emerged from the trainees at an ascending angle towards the forest. The very next second, gas propulsion sounds were heard and everyone started flying forward with an incredible speed.

For Jean, flying with the gear was thrilling.

The first second when the gas was used, he could feel his own weight depositing at the legs. The very next he was on the air with the wind blowing at an extreme speed through his face and hair. Because of the acceleration caused by the gas propulsion and the rapidly increasing momentum in his body weight, the landscape in front of him narrowed in his view as he began flying forward towards the finish line.

His first wires were now about to fully retract. He performed his now honed shifting with his handles.

_Release, fire, lock, gas… Release, fire, lock, gas… _

Those four words that went through his mind mimicked the actions he performed with his handles; his concentration consumed on it's totality. Pure, unmatched flow of mind and body.

His smoothness of motion and coordination were paying off. He was half way done through the course and the only other competitor that was always twenty meters in from of him was Mikasa.

He could not break his flow in order to look at her, but could feel her energy. It was much more vigorous than his. It would be impossible for him to explain but the mesmerizing feeling was there in his chest.

_Not for much long Mikasa. Three quarters of the race is now done. I'll get ready!_

He became extremely self aware of his environment. His plan was now about to beguine_. He would win the race! There is no doubt about it!_

-x-

"So anyway, this time the race will start at feet of the southern cliff."

Marco pointed it in the map.

"And from there we go straight through the forest until we are almost at the finish line."

Marco traced the straight line on the map with his finger.

"Now pay attention Jean."

Jean nodded.

"When the race is almost finished everyone has to turn ninety degrees left and continue forward around a hundred and fifty meters in order to reach the lake's shore, which is the _finish line_."

"Alright, I think I get it so far."

"But you'll be much faster if you cut way and go directly to shore before the ninety degree turn"

Marco signaled the shortcut on the map.

"Alright, it would be almost like I'll go though the hypotenuse of a triangle to get directly to the finish line instead of moving forward and performing the turn, right?"

"Exactly, but…the tree line is too dense around the main course; you would not fit between the trees. But when I was practicing this course, I've noticed there are two trees missing at the left side, almost at three quarters of the main course."

_So, you already did some reconnaissance._

"So, take that chance and get in that hole in the tree line to make it way faster to the finish line …Oh, I forgot to tell you something that you must be aware of, so pay attention."

"Okay"

"When you take the shortcut, and you are about a hundred meters from the finish line, remember to slow down, as there is a fallen tree that will seem to have jumped at you from nowhere if you are going too fast."

"Got it. I'll slow down."

Jean then held his chin with his hand.

"So, when I get the best time in the race, what's next on the plan?"

"When the race is finished and you have gotten to the shore of the lake faster than Mikasa, the next step of the plan is to offer her training lessons in the usage ofthree dimensional gear..."

Jean chuckled at Marco's words.

"…Which of course she'll accept kindly because you'll be the strongest guy of the class. And she'll want to be with you. She'll be totally mesmerized by you! And from there it is just a matter of time until she is your girlfriend."

Marco yelled a loud_ yahoo!_

"I really underestimated you Marco... you are really bright when it comes to this stuff!"

Marco smiled and then grabbed both of his friend's shoulders.

"Thanks Jean. I know you can do it!"

Jean threw his fist up in the air.

"Alright, I can do this!"

_Mikasa, you'll be impressed with my strength!_

-x-

_Where is the opening!? It must appear soon…_

Jean was getting increasingly uptight. He had never been in that zone before and did not know where the fallen trees of the main course were. He kept blazing forward in the air; looking frantically with his eyes to his left.

_Did I miss it?! DID I MISS IT?!_

Suddenly, as if it were a flare of hope, light that passed through the fallen trees signaled Jean that it was time to make his move.

_Alright, it is time!... Release, fire left, lock left, GAS!_

Jean took a turn to his left so sharp that made his vision blacken slightly due to lack of blood in his head. He passed the entrance with unimaginable speed.

Now it was time to go all out, since he'll have to slow down at the end because of the fallen tree Marco mentioned him.

_I'm in the shortcut! Four hundred more meters to go!_ _More gas!_

Because of the extra propulsion, the speed was now incredibly mesmerizing; the wind was now actually hurting his skin and his brown jacket was so pushed back that now seemed like a cape.

At those speeds the only two things he could hear was the hiss of the blowing wind and his pounding heart that pumped his body with adrenalin filled blood.

His eyelids were wide open from the adrenalin and the ever more pressing wind was drying his eyeballs. His arms actually started shaking from the colossal speed and it was almost unbearable to prevent them from wailing. But he managed to hold them in place, and did so with an unimaginable conviction.

_I'm going to win this race and this damn wind is not going to stop me! _

Two hundred meters left and his arm strength was gone; His arms were wailing, but his fingers could still shoot hooks.

_Hundred and seventy five meters to go! I must go faster! Release, fire, lock, gas!... RELEASE, FIRE, LOCK, GAS!_

Jean gave his all for the next fifty meters, he was not sure he had had any blood left on his brain but he managed to keep flying out of mere instinct. It had been awesome to feel so wonderfully alive at those speeds, but now, at a hundred and twenty meters from the finish line it was time to slow down.

_All right! Less gas usage now. Now, Where is that tree that Marco mentio-_

He could not finish the thought; as an object resembling massive brown bullet with cables attached flew past him at a ridiculous speed.

"_TOO SLOW!" _ The "bullet" said, propelling right on front of Jean.

He was startled and did not recognize who the wind distorted voice that he heard belonged to.

It took him second to figure out who the "bullet" was, since all he could see from the blur that flew in front, was the color of the Jacket and black hair. But then, the flash of green eyes he saw gave him all the information he needed. But Jean was not angry, he was worried; his competitor would crash against the tree.

At the lighting speed the other trainee was going warning him would be futile. Warn him he did regardless.

"JAEGER, YOU IDIOT, STOOOOOOOOP!"

-X-


	3. The Strange outcome

Chapter 3

The good thing about dinner after the "Speed Race" was the fair amount of meat that was served. A very uncommon treat for the young soldiers.

Jean had already eaten half of his stake. He was also half way through telling Marco what had happened that day at the race.

"Wait Jean, stop for a minute. Let me guess what happened next in the story."

Jean stuffed his mouth with a piece of steak.

"Ok, try it. Let's see how close you get…"

_You will never guess it though._

"So, you just told me that you had entered the shortcut, correct?"

"Yes."

"And that you speed up like crazy for the next three hundred meters, correct?"

"Correct."

"And when you slowed down in order to avoid the hidden tree, you saw Eren, who had followed you through the short cut, fly right past you at an amazing speed, right?"

"Right."

"Then it is obvious what happened next…"

Marco grinned.

"Eren rammed the tree I told you would appear with an amazing speed, got hurt, and you were forced to help him reach the finish line; therefore not making it top on the race. Am I right?"

Jean laughed slightly.

"Well in fact, Eren did ram the tree, but the tree was not in fact a big and solid tree; it may have looked like that to you when you first saw it, but in fact it was just a massive but very fragile tree bark."

"That is good news, so Eren did not get hurt at all."

"No, but watching him hit that bark was very funny."

Jean chuckled.

_And yelling "Take that Jaeger!" to him when I watched him smash through it was even more fun. _

The memory of his insult made him laugh. He then continued with his story.

"Luckily for me, his misfortune did allow me to take the lead on the course."

Jean took a big breath and continued.

"So now, I'm taking the lead and Eren is right behind me; I decide to go all out and use all the gas I have left for the final hundred meters. Eren follows suit and we are now going so incredibly fast that breathing was becoming hard and words of mutual insult that we were trying to tell each could not come out of our mouths because of the strength of the wind."

"Awesome. So what happened next? Did you arrive at finish the shore of the lake first? Did the instructors cheer you at the finish line?

"Well, you could technically say that…"

Jean put his hand behind his head and laughed nervously.

"Technically…?"

"Well, it seems that the trees that were located in the short cut were much, much taller that the trees located on the main course, and those taller trees had a ton more of foliage which was hindering our visibility."

"That makes sense, since those trees are not maintained for usage in three dimensional practices like the other ones on the main course."

"So both Eren and I underestimated what our current height was while flying through the final hundred meters and when I connected my hooks on that final thick tree line and used all my gas as propulsion, I had never felt happier…"

Jean let out a grunt.

"I thought that I was going to land gloriously on the ground to be congratulated by the instructors. So it took me by surprise when…"

Jean's face got even more serious.

"…I emerged at an unbelievable speed from thick foliage at about _thirty meters_ from the ground..."

Marco's jaw dropped.

"Thirty meters!?"

"Yep, and Eren was right behind me, probably as shocked as I was."

"So what did you do then?!"

"There was not much to be done; as we emerged from the short cut at that height, we flew past the instructors at the finish line and past the shoreline; and found ourselves flying on top of the lake… yelling our lungs out all the way. God, I've never been so scared…"

"Damn!"

"Yeah, and after a few seconds of flying, we landed on the water, about twenty meters from the shore at the other side…"

"So you both almost flew the entirety of the lake!? That lake is huge! How fast were you going?! That is crazy!"

"What can I say? We were going very fast." Jean gave that simple answer with a smile.

Marco needed a moment to process the information.

"Ok, let me get this straight, after emerging at a ridiculous speed and an even more ridiculous height from the short cut, you both flew over the lake and almost landed on the shore of the other side of the finish line, correct?"

"Yes…"

"And were you guys hurt?"

"Falling in the water wasn't as painful as I thought it would be. I'll have a couple of bruises on my feet for a few weeks though."

"I see."

"Jaeger was not so lucky, he landed on one leg and after swimming to the shoreline without saying a word to me, he had trouble standing up, nothing too big though."

Marco could not contain his amusement anymore and laughed so loud that other trainees began looking at them.

"Great story, Jean!" He mumbled in between his laughter. "I bet your grand children will really enjoy hearing it!"

Jean frowned.

"Marco... please..."

Marco somehow managed to catch his breath.

"Alright, alright...So I imagine you helped the now injured Eren, didn't you?"

"Well… look Marco, something interesting happened after we swam to the shoreline."

"What?"

"Well, after surviving that huge fall, the emotions were quite stirred up, and the feeling of relief from the fact we were alive was quite overwhelming so… eh…"

Jean's frown got slightly deeper.

"What did both of you do?"

"We looked at each other in the eyes and laughed incredibly hard for a straight minute…"

Jean couldn't keep his smirk from coming up.

"He told me while laughing that I was the craziest person he had ever met. I told him that he was and Idiot and we kept laughing."

"No way, Jean! You befriended Eren?...That is so not like you."

"I am not going to lie..."

Jean shrugged with his eyes closed.

"...I befriended him a little bit. Then I put his shoulder over my neck so I could help him walk back to the other side of the shore."

"That's nice of you, how unusual…"

"I am always a nice guy! It's other people who make me mad!"

Marco laughed slightly and then continued.

"So you both spoke to each other on the way back?"

"You know, while holding him, Jaeger told me something quite funny. He mentioned me of how Mikasa had made him promise that he would follow her at all times during the test for his safety. He had only accepted because he wanted her to stop bugging him."

Jean pointed his thumb to his chest.

"And then he told me that he feared Mikasa would give him a nasty scold for not complying. He even kindly asked for my help to protect him when we returned to the finish line where she was probably waiting…"

"Wow, he really asked you that…?

"Yeah. And I told him that I would try my best to 'protect' him. I thought that doing so would be a good way to start speaking to Mikasa and show my strength, impressing her with the fact that this time _I _saved Eren."

"So then?"

"Well, we were getting close to the shore when an instructor came at us running. He asked as if we were fine. We both told him that Eren's leg was no big deal, and then he proceeds to tell us…"

Jean cleared his throat.

"What?!"

"That my final time was seven minutes and fifty-six seconds, and Eren's time was seven minutes and fifty-seven seconds."

"So you broke Mikasa's record by little more than half a minute!? That's insane!"

"Yep."

"Now the plan seems to be going great! You are now the strongest of the class! What happened then with Mikasa? Was she impressed? Did she fall for you?" Those questions came as quick fire shots.

Jean just sighed profoundly.

"You can answer that by looking at her yourself."

Jean put on a straight face and pointed at the window with his fork. He was pointing at Mikasa.

"My god… It looks like she is… incredibly angry!"

Marco was not wrong. That night at the cafeteria, Mikasa's usual dull expression was missing, and it was replaced by one of extreme anger. Her eyelids were incredibly tense and she seemed to be cutting her meat with an unnecessary amount of strength. Marco could also see, in between the bites of food she ate, her side teeth because of the powerful sense of annoyance her mouth's grin that displayed.

"Damn it Jean! What in hell did you do to her that got her in this state?"

"I haven't got the slightest idea…"

At that moment, while tearing rabidly a piece of bread with her mouth Mikasa caught their glare. And when she did, her facial expression worsened.

Both friends gasped slightly and looked at each other quickly. Jean dropped his fork and rested his head on his palm.

"Damn, I've never seen her like this… I just followed the plan… This is so weird..."

"You did?"

"Yeah, as soon as we arrived at the finish line she came running to us to see how we were. And after asking her how she did on the race, I happily told her that I had come out first and that I am the strongest of the class, Eren even agreed with me; after that I offered her the training lessons we had planed I would offer her… and she just…"

Jean felt chills on his back while remembering.

"Let out a mean grunt directed to me, frowned deeply and tuned around with dismay to begin walking back towards the main camp."

Jean sighed.

"And she has stayed like that ever since…"

"Shouldn't you like… go and apologize?"

"Apologize? I don't even know where or if I was the one who messed up… perhaps it was Eren that somehow managed pissed her off but still, maybe tonight it would be better to let thing cool down…"

They both glared at Mikasa. She looked even more pissed than before. Now they were sure that letting things cool down tonight was the right choice.

Marco then began to fiercely rack his brain. However, after a few seconds he simply told Jean with a shrug.

"Ok Jean, right now I can't think of a reason our plan failed miserably, but I can assure you we will figure something better in the future!"

Jean smiled for a second to acknowledge Marco's optimism and then allowed seriousness to go back to his face.

"But to change this situation, we will definitely need more information about Mikasa. We'll have to find a way to get it."

Marco nodded.

"Also, we will need a more detailed plan, one that is better thought out and less risky than the previous one. Just from watching how angry Mikasa is, I can assure you we will need some genius strategy to get me out of this pickle."

Marco suddenly felt someone poke his shoulder. He turned around and saw that it was none other than his three dimensional gear cleaning partner, Armin Arlert.

At that moment something in Jean's head clicked.

"I'm so sorry to interrupt you guys, but today at the race the main fan of my gear got bent up. I was wondering if you had a spare one." He asked Marco with a smile and his hand behind his head.

"No problem Armin, I'll give you a new fan tomorrow at the-"

Marco was interrupted by Jean's cutting voice.

"Armin!"

"Uh, yeah Jean?" Armin asked, a little startled.

"Could you meet us after dinner next to the trees, outside of the sleeping cabin? We are in desperate need of your help…"

Jean's seriousness was a little intimidating to Armin.

"For what?"

"You are the biggest brain here, and we need your help to create a plan… We would owe you big time…"

Jean smiled, but he was still a little tensed up.

"Uhh, I don't know…"

Jean was now left with his last resort; begging.

"Please, I would not be asking this if I didn't think it was important."

Getting Armin onboard would increase his chances of success exponentially. Not only he was a close friend of Mikasa; thus he knew a lot about her, but in the classroom his theoretical battle plans were brilliant. The help of Armin Arlert would be the key to success…

After hearing Jean, Armin just closed his eyes and folded his arms. Jean looked at him nervously, fearing a refusal but after a few seconds of waiting, Armin looked at Jean straight in the eye and said…


	4. A New Enemy

Chapter 4

"Alright, I'm in."

Jean's face brightened.

Armin accepted partly because he was a good friend of Marco, but more than anything, he accepted because he knew that he would need their help in the near future. His race results had been horrible and didn't want to be rolled out.

"Thank you so much! We will return the favor, I swear!" Jean said while throwing his hand to shake Armin's.

"Okay, don't worry about it; I'll meet you guys after dinner, right?"

Armin laughed slightly and shook his hand.

"Right, see you there."

Armin went back to his table. Marco then looked at his two coloured hair friend.

"God, that was bold on your part Jean!" Marco said as he swallowed a piece of meat. "Armin might be very bright at battle plans but our objective has a very special nature to it. I wouldn't say it's very war related to make someone fall in love with you. Are sure this is going to be a good idea?"

"Certainly." He answered with a smirk. "I'm sure Armin will be very useful for the plan. After all, weren't you the one who told me that in _love and war_ everything is fair?"

They both laughed at the comment and continued eating their meal.

-x-

_What?! You too Armin?!_

That evening after the race, ever since she sat at the table to eat dinner, Mikasa had been staring at Jean very discreetly and very pissed off.

She had just seen how her childhood friend, Armin Arlert had shaken Jean's hand and laughed with him as if they were close friends.

She had never in her life been so angry at one person. She knew that because every time she looked at Jean at the cafeteria or remembered what he had done earlier that day made her feel like her chest was about to explode and her jaw about to crack from anger. She had never been like this.

_You are by far the biggest idiot in the world Jean Kirschtein. First you get Eren and now you get Armin…_

She could not take it anymore.

She just wanted to go to sleep and forget about today. She finished her food as quickly as she could, stood up with her plates and went to leave them at the kitchen, not looking at anyone while she did so. She wanted to be alone and think. She left the cafeteria.

The trainees were still eating their dinner and there was still a long time before the bell that signaled the curfew rang, so she decided to take a walk through the camp that she thought would relax her.

She was so wrong in thinking it would.

Walking through the outskirts of the camp and only seeing desert and darkness as landscape, she began to remember the events that happened after the race.

-x-

Mikasa's motions at race were like a flow. She did not find it difficult to fly with the gear; it was on her blood.

But knew Eren did not have it so easy. He had the tendency to crash into trees out of recklessness in the forest, so she had made him promise that morning that he would follow her every move.

She just didn't want him injured, and she knew he would not be happy if he got rolled out of training.

During the first half of the race everything was all going great, she was in the first place and every time she looked back she could see that Eren was right behind her, always trying to pass Jean.

_Both of them have some nice skills._

Certain that her adopted brother was fine, she kept swiftly flying and swinging, at mesmerizing velocities.

She enjoyed the thrill and before she knew it, half of the course was over and both of Eren and _the other guy _were still behind her…

Swinging freely in the forest she acquired a lot of speed from extra propulsion. It was the time to go fast.

Three quarters of the race were already done. She released the hooks from some trees and looked back to check on her "rivals".

She only saw green foliage.

_No one is there. Damn it, I must be going too fast. I'll slow down a little._

She got a little worried and slowed down, but those two failed to appear.

_I'll probably see them at the finish line. I should not have gone through this so rapidly._

Mikasa performed the ninety degree turn and used all the gas left for the final meters until the finish line.

As she was beginning to see the shore through the foliage, she also noticed something weird. She could see two dark spots flying rapidly through the river in a descending angle that would soon meet the water.

_What are those things!?_

However much it puzzled her, Mikasa's attention was taken extremely taken over with her own flying and could not give that much thought to what she had witnessed.

Seconds later Mikasa locked the hooks on the final trees of the course and swung swiftly towards the finish line to land on the ground of the shore smoothly.

A young instructor who was holding a watch in one hand and a paper on the other quickly approached her.

"Name?"

"Mikasa Ackerman."

The instructor wrote something in his paper.

"Your time is eight minutes and thirty-five seconds."

"Thank you."

She did not give too much thought to it and quickly looked back towards the forest. The safety of her family was more important than the records.

Twenty seconds after she landed, she saw Annie Leonhardt emerge from the foliage. Five seconds later, it was Reiner. Ten seconds later it was Ymir and Christa together, and after about a minute, a small crowd of trainees began to emerge from the forest and were all approached by instructors to let them know of their time.

Eren was not with the trainees, and after looking carefully she did not found Jean either. Twelve minutes had passed since the race had started and bad scenarios started appearing in Mikasa's head.

_Damn it! They must have surely had an accident in the forest. I'd better go see if they are injured._

Her nerves were beginning to spike again. She could not fail her family.

She faced the forest and held the handles of her gear, ready to leave on her 'rescue mission'. She aimed at the trees and was about to fire…

_Just wait for me…_

Suddenly violent cheering from the soldiers could be heard behind her.

"_Way to go guys!" "You insane bastards! How did you do that?!" "Both of you are awesome!"_

The group of trainees got together at left of the finish line and applauded.

_What could they be cheering at?_

And then, _they _emerged from the small crowd that had gathered around them.

_They _were both soaking wet and smiling widely. They began cheering the two boys. The two colored haired boy seemed really happy with all this attention.

"Thanks guys! We are fine and no need to be jealous please…"

Eren, who was being held by Jean, signaled him to let him sit on the ground. Mikasa relaxed her grip on the handles and went running with her heart on her mouth towards them. She wasn't thinking about anything else.

_What the hell happened?!_

She stopped abruptly five feet in front of them. She looked at them; concern easily readable on her face. _They_ looked at her back, looked at each other and laughed.

Hard.

"See Jean, I told you so…"

"Yeah, totally."

'_I told you so?' What's so funny!? Why are they laughing?! And what the hell happened to those two?!_

And then she remembered.

_Those dark spots I saw flying over the river… Oh no! Those spots were them flying!_

Mikasa's face still showed little emotion to the boys but it was not a true reflection of what she was feeling. Worse, Eren and Jean were still laughing.

_Don't they care about their safety?! They could have died!_

"Eren are you ok?" Mikasa asked in monotone even if she felt anger sprouting in her.

Eren stopped laughing suddenly and looked away from her.

"Yeah, It's my leg, it alright."

Mikasa looked at Eren, a little shocked.

"Why didn't you follow me like you promised and why did you do such a stupid thing that got you injured?"

Eren heard her, but did not answer. Instead he looked at Jean expectantly. Jean nodded at Eren with a mischievous smile.

"Hey Mikasa!"

Mikasa turned to look at Jean who was wearing a gigantic and prideful smile.

"What was your time on the race?"

_What does this have to do with anything?_

"Eight minutes and thirty-five seconds, why?"

Eren laughed at her comment.

"Go ahead Jean, tell her…"

Jean chuckled.

"Yeah, I am sorry to inform you Mikasa Ackerman but my time was seven minutes and fifty-six seconds."

Mikasa still did not get the point.

_Why are they acting so weird?_

"So what if your time is better? Eren let me see how your leg is, please... I'll help you."

"No!" Jean said loudly. Eren was still looking at him with an approving smile.

-x-


	5. Hints and Hatred

Chapter 5

Mikasa was puzzled. She was about to ignore Jean, but it seemed like Eren wanted him to continue.

Jean had Eren's approval to speak.

"I'm sorry Mikasa, but you are no longer the strongest of the class so there would be no need for you to keep being around Eren so much… Because _I am now the strongest of the class."_

_What did you just say? I don't understand why-_

"Jean is right Mikasa."

Eren was just happy say anything to avoid her scold. Mikasa looked at Eren with some hurt in her eyes, she now _got _it.

_So Eren doesn't think I'm strong enough for him. He thinks this Jean is the strongest. Why? He never doubted me before… It must have been Jean. He surely tricked Eren… I don't know why..._

She looked down sheepishly.

"But I care about you…"

Eren did not answer her. Instead he kept looking at Jean.

"And I'm so sorry if you are not as strong as me Mikasa…"

Jean kept going with an expression Mikasa recognized as arrogance.

"...but…"

Eren was holding his laughter back. It was the first time someone had criticized Mikasa so much. He wanted Jean to keep going.

Mikasa on the other hand, was trying really hard to hide from everyone her profound anger, barely managing to keep a straight face.

_Idiots, both of them!_

"...I could offer you some private training lessons in order for you to improve your abilities… If you are interested…"

Eren burst out laughing. This was too good to keep a straight face.

"Oh my god Jean, you are too awesome…!"

However Mikasa did not think it was one bit funny. That sentence had been the worst insult she had ever heard. Her eyes narrowed when she looked at Jean.

_Jean, you are not __only_ content with almost killing my family and driving them away from me, but you also had to mock me! Mock me through that arrogant face of yours and while claiming that you are superior! You are such an incredible idiot!

Mikasa could not take it anymore. She showed Jean for a second what she was really feeling on the inside, which she thought startled him a little bit and turned around to head back to the camp.

She didn't look back at him but if she had done so, she would have seen his confused and apologetic face staring back at her.

-x-

Mikasa opened her eyes and saw the roof of the sleeping cabin.

Sleeping did brush off some of the anger and hurt, but did not erase it. The previous night neither Eren nor Armin had wanted to have dinner with her from how aggressive she looked. They hadn't even spoken a word to her.

_Perhaps they are angry at me. I should definitely go and apologize to them for my behavior. I probably overreacted, and maybe they did not really mean to insult me. Maybe…_

She got up from her bed and noticed everyone of her cabin mates were gone.

_Damn it! I must be late… This never happens to me… _

Mikasa had not gotten too much sleep the previous night.

_That damn guy did it to me!_

She quickly dressed up in training clothing and put on the three dimensional gear straps and brown jacket on and went outside to find her friends.

_Breakfast must be over by now, so Eren and Armin are surely somewhere in the main camp._

The day after the race was always deemed by the instructor cadre as a "Rest day." They wanted everyone to preserve their energy and have some physical and mental relaxation. Everyone could do anything they wanted to.

As soon as Mikasa left the cabin she saw lots of girls talking and playing cards outside of it. One girl greeted her.

"Good morning Mikasa! Want to join us?"

"Thank you, but I have something to do."

She kept walking towards the main training area. She saw a lot a boys playing with a ball and many others playing cards and reading, none of them were their friends.

She then remembered which was Eren's favorite location inside the camp;The hand to hand combat designated area.

She started jogging.

_They surely must be there. I'll find them and apologize. Maybe I'll be able to fix this thing with Eren too. I'll talk to him and convince him that I can care for him. __There is no way Eren doesn't want me by his side protecting him and Armin really looks up to me as a friend. Everything will be just fine._

She got closer to the hand to hand combat area. It was simply a deserted piece of land that had a weirdly soft ground for some unknown reason. The cadre had decided it was safer to practice fighting there.

When Mikasa finally arrived, she could only see three people from afar.

As she got closer, she saw they were trainees but could not make out who they were.

She walked towards them slowly. It seemed that those three trainees were having a conversation.

She kept walking and when she got close enough to see their faces, she stopped on her tracks.

_Is that Armin? And he is standing next to… next to Jean!? And they are both speaking to Annie?!_

She quickly went prone so as not to be seen, but kept staring. There was one unusual fact she noticed that was happening between the conversation of those three.

_Annie is laughing hard and the boys are laughing with her! What the hell!? Why?! _

Mikasa could not stand seeing how her best childhood friend was right next to the guy who took Eren away from her, laughing together with the woman that gave Eren beatings on a regular basis.

_Damn you Jean! Is this a plan of yours to humiliate Eren? Or me? Why are you doing this!? __  
_

Mikasa could feel something tighten on her throat and her eyes beguine to sting.

She felt like going out there and beating Jean up, but knew deeply that it would not solve anything. Eren and Armin would probably still get distanced from her and she would probably be expelled from training.

She dragged herself out of the hand to hand combat area and once out, quickly stood up to beguine running towards the cabin with her eyes closed. Mikasa did not want to let everyone see her tears.

She waited until she reached her bunk to let the tears come out in her pillow.

"I hate you! I hate you Jean! Give me my friends back!" She yelled to her pillow, sounds muffled by it.

After a few minutes of intense crying she turned around in the bed and got back to her senses. It had been a long time since she shed tears.

_What was that all about?! I never cry._

She dried the tears with her left hand and took a big breath. She did not want keep feeling so bad.

Mikasa realized that while not many things in this world scared or threatened her, losing her friends was one them.

_´Crying will not solve anything´. I've told that phrase many times to Eren. It should be better follow if my own advice and calm a little bit._

She decided it was best to spend the rest of the day studying military theory in the library to get her mind of her current troubles.

The day passed through her while she read from start to finish 'Defense and Peace.' Mikasa secretly chose that book because she wanted to know more about protection in every way possible, and not just from the titans.

When it was time for dinner, she kept wondering where it would be best to sit.

_As far away from 'them' as possible. I really don't want to see them right now._

She entered the cafeteria with her dishes and began looking around for tables. She glared that Eren and Armin were happily eating with Jean and Marco. She winced at that sight.

Wanted to go unnoticed, she quickly went to the furthest table from that of her friends. On that table, Sasha was eating with two other girls.

"May I join you please?"

Sasha turned to look at her with a piece of bread in her mouth.

"hmmm?"

The former hunter girl saw in Mikasa's face something a little different from her emotionless expression. Sasha could tell there was a slight hint of sadness. She knew something major had happened to Mikasa, but knew better than to ask.

"Sure Mikasa!"

Mikasa sat down and began to eat in small bites. She was just not feeling very hungry.

_It will be better if I just eat in silence and go to bed. I want to get over this situation quickly._

The girls at the table kept chatting without much concern for her presence.

"_I did fine at the race! One instructor even congratulated me!" "That's awesome, is that instructor cute?" "Yeah, kind of old though." "Yuk!" "Ahh come one, he is not that old!"_

Mikasa was happy to hear the voices of those happy girls, even if her face did not show it.

_"I_ _heard from friend that instructor Keith once had an affair with a student." "No way! The bald guy could not attract a rock!" "His eyes are scary." "Well, my eyes hurt every time light reflects on his head and hits my face."_

The three girls laughed at the comment and so did Mikasa slightly.

"_Well I rocked the race! My time was nine minutes!" "Nice!" "I heard that one guy made it in 16 minutes!" "God that's slow!" "Oh my god girls, I think one guy was staring at me!" "That guy?" "Yeah that guy." "No, he wasn't!" "Yes, I swear he was!" "He is cute!" "Nice one pretty girl!"_

Mikasa was now feeling better hearing the girls at the table ramble about anything. She admired them a little for being so carefree about their life.

Perhaps this would be a fun dinner after all.

"_Speaking of cute guys, I heard that the guy who broke the record, Jean Kirschtein, was hugging Christa Lenz today. Every girl is jealous of her!"_

Or perhaps it would not.

"With _the blond midget?" "Yeah, I heard that Jean insulted the bully girl that was stalking Christa constantly and won her heart over after saving her." "No way in hell!" "Yes I swear, Maria confirmed it…" "That is waaaay too cute! I wish I had a hero rescue me like that!""They said that she is totally in love with him!""What did he see in Christa?""Oh come on! Christa is very cute!"_

Mikasa was now definitely not hungry.

She let out a small grunt that signaled every girl that it was sensitive topic to her. They all looked at her face; it was one of anger.

The girls got the hint and quickly changed topics.

_Now that's just great. Besides being really popular with my friends, you are now the cutest guy of the group Jean… and you go around saving girls and making them fall for you. That is just great._

Mikasa tried as best as she could to finish her dinner calmly and quickly, trying her best to hide her feeling of hurt because none of her friends had come to ask her how she was.

_They are surely having too much fun with Jean for that…_

As soon as she finished eating she returned her plates and left the cafeteria.

Once again, Mikasa found herself walking girl's cabin faster than anyone and all alone.

She felt very lonely and did like to feel that way one bit. She wanted to be companied and be company, but felt she was not required too.

While walking, she also felt that the weather was getting cold.

_Tonight is going to be a cold night; I better go to my locker and get it._

She entered the cabin and went to a small area on the side that contained all the girl's lockers. She wanted her red scarf, badly. And not only for protection against the cold…

Mikasa used her key and opened her locker without too much thought.

_It will keep me companied tonight..._

She leaned down to grab her scarf, but when she did so, she noticed something strange that was on top of her scarf. Something that had not been there before.

_It is an envelope with a letter inside!_

She was surprised that someone had slipped a letter inside of her locker, but was even more surprised when she took it closer to her face to read what those big words written on it said.

_Oh my god…_

Her eyes widened.

"_A letter to Mikasa, the girl I am in love with." _

_-x-_

_To be continued…_


	6. The Letter and feelings

Chapter 6

"_Mikasa Ackerman,_

_I am a fellow trainee of yours and you probably don't know me very well. We have spoken very few times and mostly spend time with our respective friends. _

_But, just so you know, you have left an impression on me from the first time I saw you. And I've been only looking at you from that day._

_I've never seen a more beautiful, smarter or talented woman anywhere. I honestly feel mesmerized training everyday around you. I truly do. Hiding my feelings has been getting harder each day so I believe that now is the time to let those feelings come out. And now that I mentioned myself, I'll be honest with you; I am really not a particularly brilliant, strong or brave person. _

_At least not nearly as close as I know you are. But even though I know that is the truth, I will still try my best to shine as bright as possible, so you will be able to see me._

_The real point of this letter besides to confess my feelings, is to tell you that I'll make sure we meet soon enough. I know I'm not the greatest man on earth but at least I would like show you how much of a man I can be. I'll take care of the meeting myself. Don't worry about it, trust me. You just be on the lookout from now on…_

_You do know my name, but I'd rather be known right now by you as courageous trainee. That is all._

_P.S.: Try to relax a bit from now on; anger does not look good on you."_

Mikasa was shocked. She read the letter again in mild-disbelief.

She really did considered herself an able soldier, but never really thought of herself as 'mesmerizing'. She kept herself knelt down staring at the letter with her eyes wide and mouth slightly parted.

Mikasa then took the paper closer to her face and her nose noticed a peculiar scent. With her face touching the letter, she smelled it profoundly taking a very deep breath through her nose.

_My goodness, it smells like roses… Just like the roses we used to keep in our house._

She also noticed the beautiful handwriting and the impeccable tidiness of each and every word.

Mikasa was compelled to reread it two more times. She then kept staring blankly at the letter.

_Oh my god… _

She had felt that her body had gained an incredible amount of temperature. When she touched her cheek with the back of her hand, it felt very hot.

_Oh no, I'm blushing…_

Mikasa began to wonder what emotions had begun to form inside of her since she had first picked up the envelope. It seemed to her like a mixture of feelings had grown in her body.

The emotion she could identify first was the nervousness she felt. It was very subtle, but she noticed it in her now deepened breathing.

There was also the warmth she felt. Reading that letter had made a powerful warmth glow inside of her chest and face. She wondered how feeling so heated was even possible on that frosty night.

But she could also feel that in that strange mixture of emotions, there was confusion, at least in some part of her.

'_I've never seen a more beautiful, smarter and talented woman anywhere…' _

Those words still resonated in her mind. It had been the first time someone had written her a love letter. Actually, it had been the first time someone declared her his love.

_How I'm I supposed to feel about this letter? I really don't know..._

She kept knelt down beside the locker and continued staring at it.

Mikasa now began to wonder who '_Courageous trainee' _was. She started picking up on the subtle hints.

_Eren is definitely not the author. Not with his horrible handwriting and complete lack of attention to detail. He also mentions that we did not talk too much with each other. In that I case, it's someone I already know._

_Who could it be…?_

She felt like spending the whole night thinking about the identity of the trainee that wrote it, imagining possibilities and making guesses.

It would have been a fun way to spend the night; searching in her head for memoires of all the people she had met since the start of her training but suddenly, a part of the letter that had made her a little uneasy resounded inside of her head.

'…_is to tell you that I'll make sure we meet soon enough. I know I'm not the greatest man on earth but at least I would like show you how much of a man I can be. I'll take care of the meeting myself. Don't worry about it, trust me.'_

_Oh my god, Is he really going to do it?_

Before going to the military, she had seen that adults used to meet and spend time together if they liked each other.

But this would the very first time she would be doing that.

_I don't know if I want to meet him… What I'm going to say to him when I do? What is he going to say to me? Has he really gotten it all figured out?!_

As more questions began to emerge that filled her with a sense nervousness she was not very familiar with, she suddenly also remembered some words she had also just read, and as she did, she felt almost encapsulated by those very words.

'_Don't worry about it, trust me.'_

And as those words resonated in her mind, the scent of roses and feeling of warmth inside her vanished her doubts and fears almost instantly.

Mikasa truly wanted this special moment to last forever, even if she was only holding a letter from a stranger while knelt down next to a locker.

_Fair enough, I'll trust you. If we ever happen to meet, I'll just need your help to overcome my doubts. I'll trust in your help._

It had been a long time since Mikasa had asked someone for help. Perhaps this letter would be a positive change in her life after all. Or at least she hoped so.

The bell that signaled curfew rang. It was finally time to go to sleep.

She folded the letter and carefully put it inside of the envelope with a small smile on her face.

_Whoever you might be, thank you for this…_

As she held the envelope in one hand, she looked at her scarf inside of her locker. She now felt a new sense of warmth.

_You might be an idiot Eren Jaeger, but you are still my idiot! I won't ever forget you are my family!_

She grabbed her red scarf and confidently tidied it around her neck; the envelope still in her hand.

_I should probably leave the letter in the locker._

But she did not want to let go of it or its scent.

Mikasa chuckled when she finally decided what she would do with the envelope, but promised herself that it would be only for tonight.

After closing the locker, she walked to her bed and crawled under her bed sheets. She was now facing the ceiling.

Afterwards, Mikasa took her arms out of the sheets and held the envelope very carefully on top of her chest with both of her hands, right underneath her scarf.

With a light smile on her face, Mikasa closed her eyes slowly and saw as the dimly lit ceiling began to disappear.

Mikasa slowly felt her herself falling asleep comfortably; knowing that now she did not only had her red scarf as a source of warmth to get her through the chilling night. The next few minutes passed quickly as she rejoiced herself in a calming and profound rose cent, to finally beguine dreaming in total tranquility.

-x-

_to be continued..._

**Author Notes**

Who wrote that letter? mmm... hard to tell :) By the way, what could Jean be doing? And what is he planning to do?

Until then, Adventure Span out!


	7. If you Fail to Plan

Chapter 7

While Jean was waiting for Armin to show up outside the cabin, he was thinking that letting Armin know the _peculiar _plan Marco and him would need his help with would have to be like removing an old bandage from the skin. If you did it quickly enough the discomfort of doing so should be minimum.

And then Armin arrived.

"Here I am guys, what did you need me for?"

"Alright Armin, what we need you to do is a plan to make Mikasa fall in love with me." Jean told him plainly, swallowing his own nervousness.

"What?! And why would _I _know how to do that?!"

_I knew it. He wasn't just going to say yes._

Jean's face was twisted and his hands were curled up in fists. Seeing that, Marco stepped into the conversation.

"Please bear with us, Armin."

"B-but guys, this is so strange… Do you really think that creating a plan for _that_ is _actually possible_?"

"Why not? Jean and I have already done it once…"

"And how did it go?"

The two friends looked at each other and both bit their lips. Marco opened his mouth first.

"Yeah…you know that thing that sometimes happens to Mikasa's pupils where they dilate so much that they take over her irises and she then looks like a monster? Well, she has been like that ever since our first plan took place. Really scary if I may say so…"

Jean did not like the joke.

"Marco, enough!"

"Sorry Jean…"

Armin folded his arms and sighed.

"Yeah, I know how scary it is when that happens. Look guys, I really want to help you and I could really use your help, but it seems that you already messed it up. I don't want to mess it up as well…"

Jean spoke up.

"But with you it's different Armin! You can see the big picture! And besides you really know a lot about Mikasa. It's easy!"

"But why would I know how to make girls fall in love? I don't!"

"You are smart Armin; I know that you can at least be of help!" Jean said.

"But making someone fall in love? What if the plan fails and she beguines to hate me."

"Oh come, on Armin… we won't tell her you were in."

Armin looked down.

"I'm sorry guys, but it's probably a waste of your time. Mikasa is almost unreadable and I don't think she is ever going to let go of Eren…"

That comment made Jean's chest feel compressed.

"Sorry to waste your time, but I won't participate."

"Come on, we'll help you in whatever you need! That's what friends are for, right?"

Armin's face did not change.

"Please Armin, I would be asking you if I wasn't desperate."

Armin looked at Jean straight in the eye.

"Sorry Jean, but my answer is a definite no."

Jean stopped pleading. Something had gone off in his mind. His uptightness had disappeared and now had been replaced by a strange and violent emotion.

"FINE!"

Armin was startled by his yell.

"Fine Armin! Do whatever you like!

"Jean, t-the thing is…"

"You know what?! It's okay. No really, it's okay…"

Jean now stepped in front of the startled Armin and continued.

"...you just keep doing what you do every day. Don't even try to help… "

He pointed his thumb to his chest.

"...Just remember that there are people out there who are risking failure and humiliation to get what they want!"

Marco looked at his friend with a huge smile.

_Passion hits you again Jean? This is awesome._

Armin tried to respond but only a stutter came out that was interrupted by Jean.

"Do you know how it feels to know that the person you like not only devotes herself to someone else, but also that she hates you as well? And what is worst is the reason why she hates you…"

Jean closed his eyes, and took a big breath.

"She just hates you because you tried your best to be with her but were not smart enough to do it properly! Do YOU know how that feels?!"

"Jean... I… s-swear… I…"

"We don't need help from people who are not willing to risk it! So just quit on us because you are afraid, It's really not big deal for you after all …"

Jean turned on his heel and started walking back to the cabin.

"Let's go Marco…"

"Yeah…"

The boys began walking back, Jean looking down with sadness and his hands on his pockets but after a few steps…

"Jean!"

Jean turned his head slightly.

"Ok…"

Armin's face suddenly changed to one of certainty. He looked at Jean in the eye.

"I'll make a plan. I promise I'll have a good plan ready for tomorrow at breakfast. I will try to make it as effective as possible but I can't guarantee any results though."

"Fair enough."

"You will follow it in spite of me not being certain it will work? It will be you who probably gets humiliated if it fails..."

"I'll have to risk it."

"Jean… Before today, I really didn't know you were this brave…"

Marco chuckled at Armin's remark. Jean blushed slightly.

"What? Oh… thanks, I g-guess."

Marco then spoke up.

"Thank you Armin! You made the right decision!"

"No problem."

"By the way…" Marco said.

"Yeah?"

"What did you need our help with that concerned you so much?"

Armin looked down.

"I need to get a better time at the race. I don't want to be known as 16-minutes-Arlert anymore, and one instructor was very rude to me because of my time. I want that to stop too."

"Oh come on Armin, you have to admit it was pretty funny. He was just trying to cheer you up." Marco said.

"No it wasn't; it was not funny at all."

"What happened?" Jean asked them because he hadn't been at the race with them.

Marco turned to look at him.

"After arriving at the shore, one instructor told him '_Arlert, your farts might be pretty powerful, but you would be better off if you used the gas of your three dimensional gear as propulsion. You'd probably arrive faster.' _And then everyone laughed hysterically. Hell, I laughed too, you know."

"Marco, enough!" This time it was Armin who yelled at him.

"Sorry Armin…" Marco let out a few giggles.

He then looked at Jean and both nodded.

"Alright, we'll help you, don't worry about it. We'll take care of your race time. You won't be considered weak anymore!"

Armin looked at his teammates with excitement in his eyes.

"Thank you guys! Just one more thing..." He smiled. "Every proper military operation is given a name. So what will be the name of this one?"

Jean scratched his chin.

"Mmm… I know! This operation will be called…"

He suddenly pointed at his black haired friend.

"Don't laugh or I'll kill you."

His tone, dead serious,

"I didn't say anything." Marco said with a grin.

"Good."

He then threw his fist in the air and said:

"The name of the operation will be… Operation Spined Heart!"

"Spined Heart?" Marco and Armin asked at the same time.

"Yeah! Spined Heart!"

Marco was forced to put his hand in his mouth to hold his laughter.

_You are making this hard for me Jean!_

Armin on the other hand was quite amused. "That sounds awesome. Very appropriate."

"Great! At least someone here recognizes my vocabulary skills…" Jean said sarcastically as he turned to look at Marco and his futile attempts to keep his laughter to himself.

Armin laughed and felt really happy. Jean and Marco had managed to give him a good bit of uplifting he needed so much.

_Those two are so awesome…_

Marco suddenly spoke up after a good deal of trying to hold his giggles.

"Well guys… it seems that we are all happy now." He said yawning.

"But I'm really tired today; let's call it a day, shall we?"

Everyone laughed and agreed; happy to be going to bed with a little more hope for the future than they had earlier that day.

_-x-_

**OPERATION SPINED HEART: ISOLATING THE ENEMY GENERAL.**

The sun rays were hitting Armin and Jean as they were walking into the hand to hand combat training area. Slight amount of sweat had gathered in both of the young boys faces. If the sweat came from the excessive heat or from their uneasiness over the first part of the plan they were about to execute was unknown by both.

"Tell me again Jean, why do I have to come with you?"

"Three reasons. First, protection. I want to be companied when I face _her. _God knows what would happen if she is just having a bad day and she wants me as an outlet."

Armin nodded.

"Second, if we ask her together she is more likely to believe that our reasons for asking a favor out of her are truth. If I ask her alone she'll probably think I'm a liar."

"But you could have chosen Marco for those two…"

"Yes, but you have a special characteristic that stands out, which is the third reason I asked you to come with me. It's going to be useful for our next task, or at least that is what Marco told me."

"What is it?"

"You'll give me a hint of innocence."

"Hint of innocence?"

"Yeah, when people look at you they can't help but think you have good intentions. You look way too much like a nice kid. Don't worry, that a good thing."

"Marco told you this?"

"Yeah."

They were now getting closer to _her. She _was practicing her roundhouse kicks and was performing them with a frightening speed and with an even more frightening face.

"That is what I was talking about Armin. Outlet!"

"Relax Jean, she won't kick you."

They were now a couple of steps away from her. They stopped, looked at each other and began whispering over who would speak first.

It was a pointless argument. Annie Leonhardt had stopped her training and looked at them with the same face she had been wearing. A very nasty one.

"What do you both want?" She did not ask. She ordered.

They looked at her with the best smile they could muster to show. Jean slightly gulped and opened his mouth. This part of the plan was of the upmost importance.

-x-

"Alright."

Armin had just finished his breakfast.

"I'll beguine describing the first part of "Operation Spined heart."

Jean and Marco nodded from the other side of the table, both very excited.

"Mikasa has an incredibly deep connection with her brother Eren. She devotes herself constantly to him. We all know that, right?"

"Right." Marco said.

"So, for Jean to have a chance to win her over, we need to cut that connection. We need to remove it as a factor from our operation from the beginning. That is called isolation of enemy forces in military strategy."

Armin smiled with pride because of his knowledge.

"Got it. Now how do we do that?"

"Well, I don't think it's possible to cut the connection that Mikasa has with Eren for good. Its way too strong, and Mikasa is kind of stubborn about it..."

Marco and Jean both answered at the same time.

"We know…"

"But we can arrange a situation in which they are not in contact with each other for the duration of this operation. That duration would be… ehh… until you get her to fall for you, Jean."

"Great, so we must make them not see each other for a while. How do you plan on doing that?"

"Well, Mikasa is going to want to be with Eren as much as she can but I don't think Eren feels the same. From what I watched, he seems to be more interested in hand to hand combat than hanging out with me or Mikasa. It must be that girl, Annie. She is his teacher. He seems to like being around her and train. "

Armin chuckled.

"Although she already gave him more than a few bruises…"

"Annie Leonhardt? That short blonde with attitude?" Jean asked.

"Yes."

Armin cleared his throat.

"So, the first part of the plan is to get Eren and Annie to hang out for longer time. If they could get together for most of the day, it would be ideal. That way, Eren will not be a factor when it comes to you and Mikasa since, well, he is not going to be around. Mikasa will be isolated and you will be able to act freely."

Marco was now excited.

"Sounds good! How do we get them to hang out for longer?"

"Well, it's easy. We'll ask them to. We'll probably have to invent a reason or whatever for being together more, but it's totally doable."

"Good."

"I'll talk to Eren; he still has to stay in bed for a day. Getting him to hang out more with Annie won't be a problem."

"His leg hasn't healed up yet?" Marco asked.

"He'll be fine tomorrow; it was just as a precaution from the doctor."

"Awesome. And what about getting Annie to want to hang out with Eren?"

"We'll just have to ask her too. Every morning, she works out at the hand to hand combat training area."

"And… when should we go?" Jean asked.

"After breakfast."

-x-

"Oh Annie, hello, how are you?" Jean asked a little nervous.

She did not answer.

"Ehh… ok… We were just wondering if you could do us a favor…"

"Favor?"

"Yeah… Eren Jaeger, you know, the boy that trains with you a lot…"

"Yeah, what about him?"

"Well… at the race he got injured and has to stay at bed for a while. We know he respects you a lot, so we were wondering if you could pay a visit to him…"

Annie frowned in midsentence.

"…and maybe spend a little more time with him outside of the hand to hand combat area. He would enjoy having you as a close friend."

Jean was quite scared at her gestures.

"Now, why should I do all that?"

She was not happy.

"Ehh… because… you know… he is your trainee after all and we think you might have, like… maybe a good time with him…"

Annie narrowed her eyes at Jean and looked at him suspiciously.

"Why are _you_ asking me this? Didn't you two have fight a while ago?"

"Yeah but…" He put his hand behind his head.

"He used one of the kicks I taught him to throw you down, don't you remember?"

_I remember it just fine! Trust me!_

"Yes, but right now we are kind of in a situation where…"

Annie did not want to hear the rest. She turned around and started walking away.

"I don't know what you guys are trying to do but I'm not interested…"

Jean looked at Armin with desperation. He began whispering.

"Come on Armin, help me out!"

Armin was still pretty nervous but nodded. He began yelling.

"Hey Annie!"

She only turned her head slightly in response.

"Please! We just need Eren distracted for a couple of days so that Jean can go seduce his sister, Mikasa, without complications!"

Annie stopped walking and Jean looked at Armin with fear in his eyes.

_Oh no! Outlets! We are going to be outlets!_

Armin was just standing there looking at Annie's back. She did not answer for a few seconds.

_Oh god Armin, what were you thinking?_

Suddenly a small giggle could be heard from the blond girl who immediately covered her mouth to stop it. She turned around to face the boys. Her face was slightly flushed and it was obvious that she was trying really hard to contain her laughter.

"So you guys…" Her giggles forced her to stop. "So you guys want me…" And more muffled giggles interrupted her.

Jean was just looking at her confused.

_She really thought it was hilarious!_

"So you guys want me to help Jean seduce Mikasa by distract…" Even more muffled giggles came out. "…B-by distracting Eren for a while?!" She looked at them, barely managing to hold herself.

Jean smirked feeling quite relieved. He knew what to do now.

_She is almost cracking up! If I now just to push her over the edge…_

"Yeah! Both Armin and I believe _i__ncest is disgusting_!"

That was what cracked her up.

"HAHAHAHHHAH... Oh my god!... HAHAHAHAHAH."

Annie had to hold her stomach with both her hands and tears were coming out of her eyes.

"That is the most stupid thing I've ever heard! HAHAHA… Oh god…"

Jean and Armin looked at each other, smiled and laughed with her.

"You are a freaking genius Armin!" Jean said while laughing.

"Thanks! See, It was not crazy tell her the truth after all..."

"What did you guys say? Haha…."

She was beginning to gather her breath.

"Haha, yeah I said that we know we are crazy Annie…" Armin said.

"HAHAH… Oh damn it guys…Ahh… I can't remember the last time I laughed like that."

Annie finally stood up straight, wiped the tears off her face and looked at the boys with her face red.

"Fine, Fine… I'll go visit Eren, and I'll maybe hang out it him a little more. Just for a couple of days though." She said after taking a big breath.

She began walking back to the main camp with an almost unnoticeable smile on her face. Armin smiled at her even though she was looking away

"Thanks a lot Annie! Make sure you keep him off Mikasa!"

"Yes, yes… don't mention it."

Jean was also happy to hear Annie's acceptance, but had to get something off his chest.

"Hey Annie!" He yelled.

"Yeah?"

"I'm just curious, but don't you have a problem with doing this? Don't you feel it's weird to have a plan to make someone fall for you?"

Annie turned her head and looked at Jean deep in the eye.

"In critical times _real warriors _do what needs to be done in order to succeed. I respect that. And besides, I might even have a good time watching this unfold…"

She waved her hand nonchalantly and walked away towards the Main camp, leaving a hard impression on both. Armin smiled at Jean and gave him a thumb up.

"That went well…"

"Thank god. That's a weight off my shoulders." Jean said as he patted Armin's shoulder. "Part one of the operation is done. Part two is next, right?

"Right."

"Let's go then."

And so, they left the training area to beguine part two of "Operation Spined Heart".

-x-

**Author notes.**

"Wait, did Adventure Span upload two chapters today?" Oh yes, I did. My eyes are paying for it though. The typo hunt has left them in pain, but what the hell... Eyesight exists to be used and abused. :)


	8. Sweetness and Peer Pressure

Chapter 8

Mikasa's sleep was still very deep. She had been dreaming. Dreaming about her family. Dreaming about warmth. Dreaming about a mysterious man who she could not see his face clearly.

If she had stayed asleep for the rest of her life she would have died a happy women, but strange noises from the outside of her head were pulling her out of that comfortable world.

A voice could be heard. It was a woman's voice.

"_I will still try my best to shine as bright as possible, so you…"_

Her eyelids still felt very heavy. So did her whole body.

The woman's voice continued to sound.

"_...trust me. You just be on the lookout from now on…"_

Neither the small traces of sunlight nor the voice bothered Mikasa one bit.

_Can't I stay like this for the rest of the day? _

She semi-consciously took a deep breath through her nose to smell the scent of roses, but to her surprise, that sweet scent was gone.

_What happened to it?_

Half asleep, she instinctively pressed the envelope she was holding with both hands closer to her chest only to find out that there was no envelope.

She quickly opened her eyes despite the feeling of heaviness in her eyelids and looked down at her chest. The envelope was gone, and as she realized it, the woman's voice that she had been hearing sounded again.

"_OH MY GOD! Are you serious?!" _

Mikasa quickly looked at where the voice was coming.

_Who the hell is it?_

She found Sasha pressing the letter to her face and taking deep breaths with her nose.

"Sasha!"

Sasha took her face out of the letter and looked at Mikasa with an innocent smirk.

"Sorry… I couldn't help it."

Mikasa was now blushing while giving Sasha a deadly glare.

Sasha gasped a little, and quickly looked at the door. She then gave Mikasa a last smiling glance and went outside of the cabin running with the letter in her hand."

"Wait Sasha!"

Mikasa jumped out of bed.

"Hey everyone!" Sasha said outside of the cabin and showing the letter.

A couple of girls began to look at her.

"It seems like Mikasa received a love... argh…"

She was put in a chokehold by Mikasa before she could finish the sentence.

"Give it!"

"Argh… ok, ok!"

Mikasa grabbed the letter from Sasha's hand and carefully folded it. She then went inside of the cabin without saying a word to anyone. Sasha followed her.

"Hey, I'm sorry for taking your letter but…" Sasha got closer to the black haired girl. "… Why the long face Mikasa? That is the most beautiful thing I've seen… You should be happy!"

She smiled at Mikasa who was not showing any emotions in her face.

"It's nothing important."

"Nothing important?! It's a beautifully written, perfumed love letter. And it's directed to you! I don't know of any trainee who would that. You are surely lucky!"

Mikasa turned to look at Sasha as finished putting the letter in its envelope. Her eyes showed she was slightly concerned.

"Please, don't tell anyone about this. Especially not my friends. I still don't know what to make of it…"

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, please keep it between you and me."

"Alright."

Mikasa put the envelope back in her locker and turned to look at Sasha with slightly trembling eyes.

"Do you promise?"

"Your little secret is safe with me."

Mikasa let herself smile slightly.

"Thank you."

"Don't worry about it. Trust me." Sasha said with a big smile and a wink.

Mikasa's face flushed. Sasha laughed to herself at the sight.

"Anyway, it's time for breakfast! Can't wait for it! Join us girls again if you like!"

She left the cabin with small amount saliva on the corner of her lips.

_That hunter girl… I swear I'll…_

After calming down, Mikasa then placed her scarf in her locker and got changed with the three dimensional gear clothing before leaving the cabin for breakfast.

She was still a little angry at Sasha and felt uneasy at the possibility of more people finding out about her _new lover_.

After getting her food, she glanced around the cafeteria to find her friends. This was the second day after the race and she still had not spoken a word to them.

When Mikasa finally saw them, she cringed at the view.

_Oh no… this time is worse than before._

Eren, Armin and Annie were sitting in one side of a table and Jean, Christa and Marco on the other. It seemed to her that they were all listening attentively to Jean, who was gesturing greatly to everyone.

Suddenly she saw as Armin rolled his eyes to meet her staring gaze. He then saw him mumble something to Jean. Suddenly the whole table, turned to look at her.

_What… uh… why are they looking at me?_

Mikasa quickly looked down at her plates and hurried to Sasha's table, feeling quite embarrassed.

The hunter girl had already finished her breakfast and was just sitting with a face of satisfaction while holding her belly. That face turned to one of excitement when Mikasa sat down with her food. As Mikasa started eating without saying anything, Sasha grinned at her mischievously.

"So… Mikasa, don't you have anything to share with us girls?"

Mikasa looked at her showing no emotion.

"No, why?"

"Are you sure?"

Mikasa noticed the other three girls sitting at the table were holding back their giggles.

"Yes."

"Are you really sure?"

"Yes."

_Oh god, this is just what I needed… You'd better have not…_

After a while of sharing glances of excitement, one of the girls could not hold it anymore.

"Please, can you let us see it? It would be just a second…"

_I knew it! Sasha, you big mouth! You promised!_

Mikasa sighed deeply and narrowed her eyes at Sasha who seemed unfazed by her.

"Don't worry! It's Just the four of us who know. The secret is still safe."

This was her small vengeance for the "Fart" incident. She thought talking about love would make Mikasa very uncomfortable, and she was not mistaken.

"I don't know what you are talking about."

Mikasa looked at her plates to avoid displaying eye contact.

"Ah come on! Who do you think _courageous trainee_ is? Is it true he perfumed the love letter with roses scent?"

Mikasa sighed once again. She did not like talking about herself. It made her feel really uneasy.

_I better get this over with or they'll keep bothering me with it. Or worse they might tell it to everyone._

"I do not know who he is and yes, he used perfume on the letter." She answered resigned, while keeping her eyes on the food.

"Oh my god, it was true!"

"You lucky girl!"

Sasha smirked at her friends.

Mikasa kept her eyes down and tried her best to hide her blush.

"Girls, I'm not sure that I will ever respond to that letter… Probably I won't…"

"Are you insane?! How often something like that happens to any girl? Almost never. You should at least meet up with him; a guy who goes through that much trouble is certainly a keep."

"But I don't think I want to 'keep' him… I have other important stuff to do. And I'm not sure I'm interested in boys right now…"

Mikasa really meant that last phrase. In spite of that, Sasha confronted her.

"Sounds like excuses to me… You are just really nervous about meeting him, right?"

Mikasa could not find the words to answer and just kept looking down with a slightly deeper blush.

"AHHHH! GOT YA!"

_Argh… Sasha, please shut up!_

"No… I mean it… I really don't want to…"

The other girls began to chant.

"Come on! You can do it! We know you are very brave…" .

_Why do I even bother?_

"So tell us Mikasa, who do you think your beloved guy is?

_Beloved?! I haven't even met him…._

"I don't know."

"I bet it was Eren who wrote that, or perhaps it was Armin! You hang around them a lot and they fell for you!"

Mikasa's eyes glared slightly to the table Eren was sitting and immediately returned to her plates. Her face now contorted in sadness which was not much different from her usual expression.

"No… I've known them for many years. They wouldn't do something like that."

"Really?"

"Yes, and besides in the letter it said that we hadn't spoken too much in the past…"

"That's interesting…"

_Why am I telling them this?_

Mikasa sighed once more. She was feeling distanced from her childhood friends and admitted to herself that this love confession made her quite uncomfortable.

_Perhaps it would be better to give into this conversation a little bit; it's not like I have Eren and Armin to talk about it._

"So… Who did you seldom talk to Mikasa? Let's help you figure out who _courageous trainee_ is…"

"That is a kind of cheesy name though…" Another girl said.

Mikasa now looked at the girls in the eye.

"I don't talk to most boys."

"Was there anyone who told you something worth noticing?

"I don't know."

Mikasa looked down again.

"Someone who stared at you a lot?"

"I really don't know."

"Someone who behaved awkwardly around you?"

"I'm not sure…"

The girls thought that Mikasa was neither very helpful nor very engaging. They looked at each other and shrugged. Suddenly one girl had a bright idea to spice up the conversation.

"I know why you are not telling us Mikasa. There is a guy you like and you wish it was him who wrote the letter!"

"No… I…"

"And I know who that guy is!" The girl said with glee.

"But I…"

Sasha was enticed by the subject.

"Who is it? Tell me!"

"It's Jean Kirschtein, I know it!"

Mikasa looked at the girl shocked. Her mouth wide open.

_What in hell?!_

"Yeah! That's why you got so mad when we mentioned him and Christa yesterday. You were of jealous of her! How did we not see it earlier?"

_No, you guys are wrong. You guys are so wrong you can't even beguine to comprehend._

"Now I understand. You like strong boys. He is also cute and popular. Look at him; he is acting like he is the leader of his table: gesturing and giving orders to everybody." Sasha stated.

Every girl but Mikasa turned to look.

"She is right, he is so dominant!"

"Girls I …"

Sasha then concluded with a joyful grin.

"My god and you were wishing he was the author of the letter, but he is with Christa now though. That is why you are angry!"

"Girls, I'm afraid you are mistaken."

She looked at Jean's table.

"I'm quite certain that Jean hates me."

All the girls narrowed their eyes at her. A girl opened her mouth.

"Why would he hate you?"

"It's complicated."

Mikasa closed her eyes as anger leaped at her again.

"And besides that doesn't matter. He is with Christa now, isn't he?"

"Actually, he's not." A girl said. "Christa told her friends that Jean only wanted her as a close friend and that they were not a couple."

"And they believed her?" Sasha asked.

"Yeah, it seems like they are only friends."

"So Mikasa still has a shot, doesn't she?"

"Girls…"

_This is getting ridiculous…_

"Really Mikasa, why would he hate you?"

Mikasa finally snapped with a tiny bit of anger showing at her face.

"It's just that my friends really like him, and ever since that race neither Armin nor Eren have spoken to me, while both seem to be spending lots of time with him."

"So you really _are _jealous of him?"

Mikasa did not answer. She only closed her eyes and folded her arms. The girls took it as a yes.

"And hasn't he tried to befriend you as well?"

Mikasa closed her eyes and tightened her expression.

"No, he actually rubbed in my face the fact that he was better than me and then proceeded to mock me in front of Eren."

"Perhaps he was just trying to impress you…"

Mikasa let out a breath of frustration.

_Yeah right…_

"Wait, didn't Eren and Jean fight a while ago?"

"Yes they did. Jean and Eren have conflicts of ideologies. It seems like they are past that; fortunately for both." Mikasa answered.

_But not fortunately for me._

"Perhaps there was another reason they both fought, if you know what I mean, Mikasa…" A girl teased.

_God, what are these girls thinking?_

"And has Jean spoken to you a lot in the past?"

"No, he hasn't."

"That is a good sign. The author of the letter said he didn't speak to you a lot as well. "

_This is insane; I better end this conversation quickly._

"And did he say something romantic to you in the past?"

"No he hasn't and please…" Mikasa said in an annoyed tone. "…Can we stop talking about Jean? I'm getting tire…"

Suddenly, her eyes widened as she remembered. And as that long forgotten past event returned to her head, her slight blush became much more defined.

_Oh my god…_

The girls noticed this sudden emotion grow in her. Sasha was now curious again.

"What is it, Mikasa?"

Mikasa looked down.

"It's nothing..."

"Come on! What went through your mind?"

"It's just something that happened a while ago. Probably means nothing." She mumbled.

"What is it?"

All the girls looked at her. Mikasa looked shocked.

'_I think your hair looks beautiful'. Oh god… It's probably nothing. He surely says similar things to every girl. I remember he was blushing… oh god. But he did not write the letter of course. Such an arrogant idiot could never have done it…_

Mikasa decided it was time to end the subject of the letter. Her mind was going to ridiculous places. She forced herself to snap out of her shock and told everyone with certainty.

"Girls, Jean is definitely not the author and besides, I have make things right with my family first before anything else."

The girls looked at each other unimpressed. After a few second Sasha grinned at Mikasa.

"But you do admit it though, right?"

"Admit what?"

"That you at least like Jean a little bit, come on we can all tell…" She playfully pushed Mikasa's shoulder.

Mikasa sighed once more.

_Again, why do I even bother?_

_-x-_

As breakfast was finished, the training day started. For Mikasa, the running and three dimensional training went without a hitch. And though her face looked as it normally did, she had been thinking profoundly the whole day. The only trains of thought that went through her mind were about Eren and his new "friendship" with Jean.

She was sad and frustrated with herself. She could not bring herself to speak to them. Mikasa was feeling afraid. Afraid that once again she would be ignored or mocked.

_Why do I feel such a pressure in my chest when I try to talk to them?! Damn it Mikasa, control yourself!_

This was it. It was noon and the training had finished. All the trainees were going to get changed for dinner. This was the time she would make things right with of Eren for good and try to make him ignore Jean.

_I'm going to make you talk to me Eren and we'll be together once more!_

She saw as Eren, Jean and Armin were walking together laughing while heading back to the cabin. She began walking towards them but it seemed for her as if she was walking in slow motion. She stopped in front of them and with a lot of effort her voice began to sound.

"Eh… Guys, hello!" She said as loud as she could.

Eren grunted and then talked back in a dull voice.

"Oh, Mikasa. How is it going?"

"Good, I just wanted to see how you…"

She stopped talking as she saw Eren looking away from her. Armin was also looking away from her with an expressionless face.

Mikasa looked down with sadness. She felt her heart was about to crumble.

"Oh… guys… I'm sorry…"

_What is going on? What did I do to them?_

"Hi Mikasa! Good to see you. How's your day been?" Jean asked so as to snap her out of her sorrow.

He was giving her a warm smile with eyes full of an emotion she could not readily identify. Somehow it made her feel a little better.

"Oh, hi Jean. It has been a good day, I guess."

"Really? You seemed quite different this couple of days…"

Mikasa turned to look at Armin and Eren who were still looking away. She then returned her gaze to Jean.

"Oh… I guess I've been distracted."

"Hasn't something happened to you?"

Mikasa could feel that Jean's tone was not one of mockery. It sounded as if he really did care about her state. She was still suspicious of him though.

"No, I-I'm really ok…"

Jean chuckled.

"Well if that's the case…" He looked at her with an endearing smile that made Mikasa slightly gasp. "…That's awesome to hear."

Jean maintained a strong eye contact Mikasa could not match. She looked down shyly.

_Why I'm looking down? Damn it Mikasa! Its Jean you are speaking to…_

Jean laughed again at Mikasa's gesture. Mikasa took notice of this mockery and forced herself to answer back even if it was just a whisper.

"Jean, please stop it…"

Jean smiled at her and straighten his face back with fake seriousness.

"Alright, sorry about that. I just want to tell you that if something ever bothers you…" He punched Mikasa lightly in her arm, which made her head snap up. "…You can always talk to me about it."

"Ehh… thank you."

_Is he trying to befriend me? Why?_

Mikasa could feel Jean's sincerity in his speech, which felt quite odd for her…

_He perhaps does want me as a friend. I don't know what he is trying to do._

Suddenly an idea passed through her head.

_I'll ask him for help on how to get my friends back. I really hope he is not planning something mean. I'll have to wait and observe him for a while longer._

"Well let's all get changed for dinner, shall we?"

Armin and Eren mumbled a "Yeah" and the three proceeded to walk to their cabin, leaving Mikasa standing while she looked at them.

_Guys…_

When the three boys walked outside of Mikasa's view, Armin spoke up.

"Well done Jean. That was pretty good."

"Thank goodness. She didn't seem that angry."

"Yeah. Don't worry about it though, she'll probably feel better in a few minutes, right?" Eren remarked.

"Right…" Jean smiled.

And the three boys laughed together once more.

Mikasa arrived at the cabin quite confused after seeing the boys and a little disappointed with herself because she could not do anything to mend up the relationship between her and her friends.

She got out of her dirty training clothes and went to her locker to reach her night clothes and as she did, she again found something that had not been there before.

_Oh god… Another envelope!"_

-x-

_to be continued..._

**Author notes**

Another envelope... What could it say? What will Mikasa do with it? And what about part two of operation spined heart? And Christa's deal in all of this? mmm...

By the way, did you like the extra chapter gift? It took a lot out of me and I'll be slightly busy with real life stuff so it will be a small while until I post another chapter. But I'll make it worth the wait. Don't worry about it. Trust me. ;) Until next time, Adventure Span.


	9. Insecurity and Friendship

Chapter 9

Mikasa picked up the envelope and held it at eye level.

_Oh no. Another letter…_

Fear started to well up inside of her.

_I don't want to open it. I don't want anything to do with it._

Mikasa did not want to deal with anything new. She had already more than enough trouble with her family. She closed her eyes and gripped the envelope tightly.

_I know these are going to be words of love. But who is going to be writing them?! Arhg…!_

And besides the uncertainty about the author, she was still worried about someone.

_Jean. That guy… Could he be the author? No…definitely not, _

The thoughts became conflicted, _ But… but the girls have a point, he does fit in with the description of the author… No! It couldn't have been him._

She gritted her teeth.

_Jean, I don't get what are you trying to do. First you tell me I have beautiful hair, and then you mock me and steal my friends away. And then you offer me assistance if I had any problem, and you do it with that smile…_

She remembered the smile that Jean had given her and how it embellished his features. Mikasa blushed at the thought.

_What are you thinking about Mikasa! Stop it! It's Jean! The guy who almost killed Eren at the race!_

Mikasa performed exceptionally at most things but at that moment she wished she could have excelled at being a mind reader. Luckily for her, she could not dwell too much at the thought. Ymir snapped the cabin's door open and began yelling.

"CHRISTA! I know you are here! What the hell is wrong with you!? Why didn't you come with me?!"

Mikasa quickly grabbed the envelope with one hand and inconspicuously held it at her side. She had thought the cabin was empty but apparently she had been mistaken.

"Don't make me look for you Christa!"

Suddenly, Christa slowly came out of the small space in between a bunk and a wall, where she was supposedly hidden. The small girl was clearly uptight. The nervousness in her face could easily be seen. But there was something about her expresion that struck Mikasa.

_Her eyes._

Despite her obvious nervousness, Christa's eyes displayed a powerful sense of purpose and determination. And as she walked forward and stepped in front of Ymir, those fierce eyes seemed to stab Ymir, who looked directly at them.

"So… You've been like that ever since that idiot talked to you. Has he threatened you? Has he forced you to be like this?"

At those words Christa's eyes narrowed even more.

Mikasa seriously thought this argument would end badly.

-x-

"Awesome. And what about getting Annie to want to hang out with Eren?" Marco asked a little worried.

"We'll have to ask her. Every morning, she works out at the hand to hand combat training area."

"And... when should we go?"

"After breakfast."

Jean and Marco looked at each other and nodded. Jean then directed his glare at Armin.

"Great, we'll do that. That would be part one of the plan, right?"

"Yeah."

"And part two?"

"Well, about part two…"

Armin put his hand behind his head.

"What about it?"

"Well, in theory, Mikasa would be now isolated after part one. So now, we would have to perform some sort of action to make her fall for you. The thing is… I have no idea how to make a girl fall in love with someone."

He shrugged.

"You guys have any idea on how to do that?"

Marco and Jean looked at each other and quickly back at Armin.

"No…" they whispered at the same time while looking down.

"Alright then. That is going to be part two of the operation. We will have to find out what makes girls fall in love with boys! And when we find out, part three will be to perform that action."

Jean and Marco smiled.

"Sounds good guys?" Armin said eating the last his last bite of breakfast.

"Yes, but…" Marco said a little nervous. "How do we find out?"

Armin looked at him with a face full of pride.

"Always remember Marco: 'The plans that are simple are the best.'"

Armin was quoting 'Defense and Peace'."We'll just have to ask a girl on what makes her fall for a boy."

Jean let out a nervous laugh.

"Damn it Armin, couldn't you have chosen something easier to ask?"

"Ehh…"

"Alright, alright. And who should we choose to ask?"

Armin looked up at the ceiling as he held his neck with fingers intertwined. "Mmm… that is a though one… I'm really not sure. Who do you guys think it should be?"

Marco spoke up.

"Let's see… It has to be someone who is very girly, very feminine, and who is going to be willing to help us…"

"I know!" Armin beamed.

"There is this girl called Christa Lenz. I've seen her a few times helping out the injured trainees and giving her all to it. She even cried when someone had broken his leg. She also seemed to me like a feminine and a nice girl. She might be our best bet."

"I know who she is. Do you think she'll help us then?" Jean asked.

"I really hope so."

_There is no time for having doubts. I'll trust Armin in his choice._

"Well, then it's decided. We'll talk to her after part one has ended. Sounds good?"

He looked at Armin confidently, who stared back with an equally matching confidence.

"Alright Jean, we'll do it!"

-x-

The two boys approached the main camp and began looking for the petite blond girl. They couldn't find her in the main camp at first so they got separated to cover more ground.

Jean was the one who managed to find her; she was leaning back against the woman's sleeping cabin with her hands behind her back and a concerned expression.

Jean approached her trying to be as friendly as possible. Spooking her in that delicate state she seemed to be would not help his plan.

"Oh hello Christa…" He said with a hand behind his back.

The blonde girl perked up slightly and looked at him.

"Oh, hi Jean..."

"Everything good?"

She looked down and sighed profoundly. She answered a soft "Yes" regardless.

"Great… Uh, look… I know we don't talk a lot, but I would like to ask you for your help in a very important matter… Is it ok with you?"

The girl looked at him with a small smirk. Her sudden uplift in mood took Jean by surprise.

"Yes, of course, what do you need my help with?"

_This was a good idea. Way to go Armin!_

"Well look… It's a sort of embarrassing but…"

He blushed slightly.

"...I just would like to know what makes girls fall-"

"OI Christa! What is taking you so long?"

It was Ymir.

Christa and Jean looked at her. Christa's happiness was no longer visible on her face, while Jean was now visibly worried.

Ymir approached the two. When she stopped, she eyeballed Jean really carefully. She could smell something weird was going on.

_Is he… trying to pick her up? Trying to pick my Christa up?!_

"What are you both doing?"

Christa began fidgeting.

"No…Ymir... he was just asking for my help…"

Jean wanted Ymir to calm down.

"I just needed her help with some stuff…"

Ymir began stalking foward menacingly.

"WHAT KIND OF STUFF?!"

Jean flinched at Ymir's loud shout.

"Ehh… " He tried to smile and look as innocent as possible. "It is a secret…"

Jean gave her a sheeply smile that he hoped would stop the scold. Still, the aggressiveness of Ymir was starting to get on his nerve.

_Who the hell does Ymir think she is?!_

Ymir proceeded to ignore Jean. She confidently put her hand around Christa's shoulder. The petite girl was startled at the sudden touch.

"So…" Ymir said looking at her seductively. "Shall we go run now?"

_That stupid Jean… I bet he just wants Christa for himself… I will show him._

Christa's legs seemed like they were shaking.

"I… I just don't want to go running right now…"

"Come on, we don't have time for this…"

"O-ok Ymir!"

Ymir smiled and began pulling her away from Jean.

He could not take anymore.

"OI! Ymir, STOP RIGHT NOW!"

Ymir stopped walking.

"Look Ymir…"

Jean's face had changed. It was no longer an innocent expression. His eyes were now filled with anger and fury.

"I was talking to Christa first… and I really need her help. Besides, it is obvious she doesn't want to run right now. So just let me talk to her for a while and then you two can do whatever you want!"

Jean's words were polite. His face was not.

Ymir looked at him and chuckled.

"Come on Christa, let's not waste time with this idiot…"

Ymir used the arm that was on Christa's shoulder to grab her wrist. She began pulling her away. Christa just followed along while looking down.

Suddenly, she felt another strong hand take a hold of her other wrist with a great deal of strength. She looked back. It was Jean, who now looked furious.

"I WON'T LET YOU DO THIS TO HER YOU ABUSIVE…" Jean doubted for a second about the next word he was going to say. "…BITCH!"

A lot of trainees were now watching the scene unfold.

Jean gave Christa a strong pull backwards that yanked her away from Ymir's grip. The pull was so strong that Christa almost fell backwards, but Jean managed to grab her tiny frame and held her close to him protectively with one arm.

"NOW SHE IS MINE!"

He smirked at Ymir, whose surprise was now replaced with anger.

"You bastard!"

"I was talking to her first! She'll talk to you later! Wait for your turn!"

Jean began moving away very quickly from Ymir while holding Christa in his arm.

"Christa what are you doing?! Come back NOW!"

"I… I..." Was all that Christa could mumble; she was paralyzed.

Jean was walking as quickly as he could and every couple of steps checked back to see if Ymir had followed them, and surprisingly for him, she hadn't. She just stood looking at them furiously from afar.

Jean grinned evilly at her while continuing to drag Christa.

_Haha! I intimidated her! I bet she did not see that one coming! I win this time! I WIN, I WIN, I WIN! Oh my god, I can't believe I just did that! _

When Jean and Christa were away from Ymir's view, Jean casually pressed his hand to the back of her chest to signal her to stop and as he did, he felt a strong heartbeat that was beating incredibly fast.

_Oh my god… She is panicking…_

He looked at her face and could not read a single emotion. She seemed shocked. Immediately, Jean stepped away from her.

"Oh… I'm so very sorry about that. I swear I didn't mean to."

Christa did not answer. She just mumbled something that Jean could not hear.

_God, this is not good. I need to calm her._

"It's just that… I know the type of person Ymir is. And they suck! I could not let that mean girl make you suffer!"

Christa now looked at him. It was at that moment that Jean realized that maybe not everyone was as confident as he was.

_Wait, did I call myself a confident guy? That seems like something that would have come out of Marco's mouth…_

While chuckling to himself he noticed that the small blonde girl was shaking.

_I have some explaining to do… I hope she is not mad at me…_

"Look Christa, a while ago, when I at Trost, I was a bit of a shy boy…" He said blushing slightly. "And a lot of people forced themselves into my life just because they were stronger. They called themselves my 'friends' and forced me to do things I did not want."

He looked down shyly.

"I really had a bad time. But I just had to learn to yell 'Leave me alone!' to them a couple of times. And then just like magic, everything was better!" He looked at Christa again; she was still quite agitated but now could maintain eye contact.

"It really pissed me off that the same happened to you Christa, I could not help myself… Sorry if I made you uncomfortable."

Christa gave Jean a small smile.

"J- Jean I-I really d-didn't want to run right now… I'm sorry about your childhood Jean…"

"Oh… don't worry about it. These days, I've got good friends. We help each other constantly. I really don't know why they do it sometimes. Those crazy basta-"

He stopped in midsentence and looked down. "I'm really lucky I guess…"

He looked back at Christa.

"But hey… If I you really did not want to go with Ymir… then it means I was helpful to you, wasn't I?"

"Thank y-you"

Their eyes met for a just a second. He held the eye contact and his smile transferred onto the blonde girl. He noticed it, and felt a jolt of happiness because of it. He suddenly remembered the point of speaking to her.

"Ehh… and about that thing I wanted your help with…" He said breaking the eye contact.

"Y-yeah!"

Jean led her to a tree and they both sat down next to it. Jean blushed a little bit.

"Look Christa…"

Jean gulped.

"There is this girl I like a lot, and I'm willing to do anything to get her to fall for me…"

Christa looked at him confused.

"…I need to know what makes girls love boys… I'm sure you could let me in on the secret…"

"I… I don't know if there is a secret…"

"What?"

"I'm not s-sure what makes girls fall for a boy, they never taught us that…"

"Oh… But what makes a girl drawn to a boy and want to be with him? Please I really want to know…"

"I… I…"

She looked at him shyly.

"Sometimes… we girls… are not very sure of ourselves, and when a boy comes to us and somehow gives us confidence… we really enjoy spending time with him. I…I… think"

"Oh… So I should give Mika…"

He stopped himself.

"Ehh… the girl I like confidence, right?"

"I-I think…"

"Mmm, now how do I do that?"

"Jean… I-I…" She looked down. "You are very sure of yourself… I don't think you will have a problem."

"I am?"

Christa nodded.

"All right then… " He smiled. "Give her confidence…"

Suddenly a new thought entered his mind.

"What if the girl doesn't need confidence from me? What if she is always sure of herself?"

Christa looked at him a little suspicious.

"Who is she, Jean?"

Jean felt a shiver in his arms but after a second of thinking he looked at her with a serious face.

"All right, I'll tell you… But you promise to keep it a secret between us… please…"

"Ok."

"It's… Mikasa Ackerman."

His blush got deeper and Christa smiled slightly at the sight.

"I know her. We practice hand to hand combat together." She laughed to herself. "Or she mentors me… would be a better way of saying. She seems like a really nice girl to me."

Jean was looking down. Christa could tell Jean's usual confidence was lacking when speaking about the oriental girl.

"Jean you are right, Mikasa is pretty confident but… w-we all girls have our doubts."

"Mikasa too?"

The blond girl shrugged. "Maybe…"

"Mmm…Ok…"

He looked back at her with determination. "You have any idea of what I should do Christa?"

Christa looked at him with almost the same determination Jean had looked at her. He _had _given _her _some of his confidence.

"I… I've heard from my mom that my dad had been sending her secret love letters for months and that made her fall in love with him..."

"Love letters?"

"Yes, a beautifully written letter where you confess your feelings for her in romantic words beautifully written on a piece of paper."

"Romantic? Uh, I'm not really a romantic individual…"

The voice of his best friend sounded suddenly inside of his head 'Yes Jean, you are romantic!"

_Shut up Marco!_

"…but I guess I could give it a try_…" _

He grabbed Christa's shoulders, pleading "Would you help me write it, please?"

"O-of course Jean! I know how to make a nice letter. I've seen a lot of them before."

"Thank you!" And he let go of her shoulders. "Meet me in the classroom at dusk…" And turned around and began walking away. He wanted tell the news to Armin.

"Yeah… I will meet you there."

"Oh, by the way Christa…" He turned back to face her. "Today I've helped you and you've helped me. And we didn't force each other to do so. Guess that makes as friends…" He offered her his hand. "Do you want to be my friend so we can help each other out when we need to?"

At those words, Jean saw that Christa's smile became the widest he had ever seen in a girl. She semi-confidently grabbed his hand and shook it.

"Yes, of course I want to."

"Well then..." His grip on her hand tightened slightly. "You are now officially part of Operation Spined Heart."

Christa looked at him puzzled.

"What?"

-x-

Marco had heard from Armin that Jean was in the class room, performing a key part of the plan. He entered the darkly lit room that was only illuminated by a candle on a desk. Marco could see the backs of two people near the candle. A blonde girl was sitting, seemingly writing something and a two colored haired boy was standing right next to the girl.

"Jean?"

The boy turned around.

"What is it Marco?"

Marco opened his eyes and gave his friend big smile, admiration easily readable on his face.

"I heard about what you did today! Everyone is talking about it! You really did that with Ymir?!"

The blonde girl turned to look at Marco with a small blush on her face and downcast eyes. Jean immediately spoke on her defence.

"Marco we are busy here!"

"Oh, sorry." He said, keeping his smile on.

_No way, it is true! You really did it! I knew you could do it, you badass!_

Marco approached them and began whispering to his friend.

"So… what are you two doing here?"

"Writing a letter… a love letter for Mikasa."

"Love letter?"

"Yeah."

Marco grinned mockingly.

"That sounds so…"

Jean showed him his teeth and narrowed his eyes.

"...awesome."

Jean relaxed his features.

"Good. Christa has been really helpful. She even had the idea of having a romantic meet up with Mikasa."

Christa turned to look at Jean a little nervous because of the black haired boy's presence.

"S-so Jean, what do I write next?"

"We are almost finished now, so as you said I should give girls confidence. So it should be… I know! Write 'Don't worry about it. Trust me.'"

Marco nodded at his friend.

"That is really smart Jean."

"I know." Jean showed prideful grin. "Now the letter is finished. I just have to tell her who sent it. My identity has to be kept a secret though; I'll have to pick an alias. Any ideas Christa?"

"Ehhh…. I don't know. I'm sorry"

"I have an idea." Marco chimed. "What if you called yourself _'Courageous trainee'?_

"Courageous trainee?"

"Yeah."

"Why?"

"It suits you perfectly."

Jean sighed.

"If you say so…" He looked at the blonde girl. "Christa!"

"Yes Jean?"

The last part of the letter will be '_I do have a name, but I'd rather be known right now by you as courageous trainee. That is all.' _ Simplistic, right?"

"Alright Jean."

Christa proceeded to finish the letter with a smile her face.

"And could you add a P.S. saying that anger does not look good on her? That way she'll know I care about her."

"Ok." And immediately she finished her writing and put her pen back in the inkstand.

"There it is guys." She softly blew on it, one, two, three times as the candle illuminated her face.

She gave it to Jean, who looked at it with Marco. After reading it carefully, Marco's jaw dropped. He looked at Christa and cleared his throat to regain some composure.

"C-Christa, this is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen in my life."

Christa stood up slowly and gave them a surprisingly serene smile that adorned her candle lit face.

"I will use a rose perfume my mother gave me to fill it with delight. And I will put it the letter inside Mikasa's locker tonight, so she'll have a good night of sleep." She whispered in a soft voice.

Marco and Jean were just standing looking at her, dumb folded from the bliss she emanated. Jean spoke first.

"Ehhh… Christa… If there is ever something you need me for, you will always be able to count on me."

Christa laughed slightly, looked down and looked at them; her face full of glowing energy.

"Don't worry about, I'm just content with being able to help the people I can call my friends." She pressed her hand to her heart, but not in a fist; she pressed it softly with an open palm.

Her serene candle lit face and her sudden gesture of loyalty struck Marco profoundly. He could not help but gasp at mystical aura that emerged from the tiny girl.

_Goddess._

_-x-_

"So you are not going to answer me?! Why don't you say something? Just come with me now Christa!"

Christa closed her eyes for a second. Mikasa could tell she was remembering something. She suddenly opened them and directed them aggressively to Ymir.

"Leave me alone Ymir!"

"What?!"

"Leave me alone!"

"What are you saying…"

"That you please leave me alone!"

"Christa, I… I…"

"I don't want to go with you right now!"

"Oh… I…"

Ymir gritted her teeth. The shivers she felt in her chest at the thought of loosing Christa had an effect on her. She sighed.

"Okay, Christa." She said not looking her in the eye. "Let's not go."

The stabbing eyes of Christa still directed at her face, were too much for her to handle. With her face full of sadness she turned around.

"Sorry…"

_God, this can not be happening… Damn it! She hates me, Argh… Christa hates me!_

"Ymir!" The small girl managed to say before Ymir was out of sight.

"Yeah?"

And with the most glowing smile Ymir had ever seen, Christa said, every word full of caring.

"We can still have dinner together…"

A soft smile appeared on Ymir's face.

"That'd… That'd be nice Christa."

And then Ymir left.

Christa looked at her from afar and let out an enormous breath. She then turned to look at Mikasa, who had watched the whole affair, with that smile that had captivated Ymir.

"You know Mikasa, that felt good."

Mikasa turned her head slightly to meet that face. She only responded with a soft smile of her own.

"Say, Mikasa…" Christa said as she approached the oriental girl. "What do you think about Jean Kirschtein?"

"What?"

"You know… he is a special boy. He cares about people and really has good intentions."

Her voice was splashing sweetness.

"He was the one who suggested I do that to Ymir… well, sort of."

"Oh, I see…"

Mikasa was still confused about it.

"I've never seen a more determined boy in my life. His eyes, for some reason seem to give me strength when I need it, as weird as it sounds. I really don't blame you, Mikasa." She looked down shyly.

"Blame me? Why are you telling me this?"

"I thought you'd like to hear it, that's all."

"Me? Why?" Her voice sounding like a perfect counterfeit of calmness.

Christa gave Mikasa a slight smirk and sharpened her voice.

"Because someone told me that you are in love with him."

Mikasa's eyes widened.

" Ehhh... What do you…" She then remembered that someone might have spread the rumors. "Uhh…"

She sighed and looked down. Arguing would be pointless.

"You know…" Christa continued. "Jean told me he was in love with a girl from the squad. He told me he would do anything to get her to fall for him."

Mikasa was now blushing.

_What am I doing!? I don't even know if this has to do with me at all! Come on Mikasa, stop feeling like this!_

But her body betrayed her none the less.

"I don't know who that girl is, but I'm sure that if you go tell him your feelings, you might still have a chance. Just think about it."

Mikasa could not find it in herself what was needed to give straight answer. There was an emotion at play. An emotion that she could not identify and definitely could not stop from erupting in her body.

"Christa… I… I… don't…"

"By the way Mikasa, what's that thing you are holding in your hand?"

"Oh…"

Mikasa gulped.

"Just a letter from s-someone, that is all."

"Ok, don't worry about it... Well, I'm going… good luck Mikasa!"

And so, Christa stepped out of the cabin, leaving Mikasa looking at her, shocked.

_Don't just leave me like this Christa, Come on!_

This is just what she needed, more confusion. And she still had not opened the envelope.

_Damn it! The envelope! I forgot about it!_

Double checking to see if there was anyone around, she slowly opened the envelope and took the letter out.

It read, in the same beautiful handwriting as before,

"_Tonight, two hours after the curfew bell rings, make sure to be at the old wooden port at the lake. I'll have a surprise waiting for you. _

_Courageous trainee."_

She smirked at the letter and put it back in the envelope. She placed the letter carefully on the locker and stood up with decisiveness on her face

The doubts in her mind about what she would have to do next were gone.

_-x-_

_To be continued._

_**Author notes**  
_

How will the meet up turn up? I'd like to think It'll be a special ocasion for both Mikasa and Jean.

A big thanks to ThatGirl35 who was my beta. Happy JeanKasa week!


	10. Lakes and Fire

Chapter 10

**OPERATION SPINED HEART: CRITICAL PLANNING**

Jean had arranged with all the members of "Operation: Spined heart" to meet up at breakfast the day after the letter was written. Marco, Armin and Christa were sitting at the table ready to begin discussion about the meet up that they'd previously arranged would be tonight.

Jean was walking to the table while holding his plates. He suddenly noticed that someone he had not expected at the table had just sat down.

"What the hell are you doing sitting here Jaeger?"

"Someone invited me."

"Who!?"

As soon as Jean asked that question, Annie approached the table and sat next to Eren.

"I did."

"Uhh?"

Annie looked at Jean with an expressionless face he interpreted as having an extremely slight hint mockery, almost if she was looking to convince herself that the situation was ridiculous.

"Mikasa is his family, he has a right to know."

Jean looked at Eren who was looking at his plates showing a slight disinterest.

"So Eren… has Annie told you already?"

"Yeah… I don't really get what are you trying to do, but apparently it's something that is going to be good for Mikasa."

Marco began whispering at Jean.

"Hey, should we to postpone this meeting? Eren might not want to help."

Jean sighed.

"Nah… He is now a sort of friend. I think…"

"What?!"

"Shhhhh Marco… maybe… with time… But he may help us right now!"

"Alright. Your call."

Jean looked at Eren with fiery eyes and spoke up.

"Jaeger, tonight I'm meeting up with your sister. We are going to talk. And you are going to help me, alright?"

"Geez, fine. Talk with Mikasa all you want. Just make sure that when we graduate you don't get swallowed hole by a titan from your lack of training focus."

"Eren, you son of a…" Jean was about to shout, but the hand Marco placed on his shoulder stopped him right in time.

"Hmm… Fair enough Jaeger." Jean answered swallowing his pride.

He then slammed his fist into the table to command everyone's attention.

"People, right now we have to plan a meet up that will happen tonight. I still don't know in which place to meet her or what to do, so I'll leave myself open to suggestions from you guys. I… I trust you guys."

Jean tried his best to keep his voice straight, trying to avoid the others see his up tightness and concern. Armin was the first to speak up with an overexcited grin.

"You sneak into the girl's cabin at night, give her a bunch of flowers while she is on her bed and confess your feelings for her. My grandpa told me that's how he got grandma to marry him."

Jean looked at him stunned.

"Your Grandpa was a strange man."

"Well... I'm alive because of it. He said that was the most romantic night of his life." He said in a low voice.

"Yeah, there is no way in hell I'm doing what Armin suggested. Other possibilities?"

Armin looked down slightly embarrassed. Marco then spoke up.

"What about meeting her in a rooftop of a cabin? That's romantic…"

"No, that's dangerous, we may fall off."

Christa raised her hand and Jean nodded at her.

"What about stealing some food from the kitchen and give it to her as a gift you two can share?"

"She is not Sasha. What else?"

All the people in the table stayed silent and began looking at each other.

"Come on! There has to be something that works!" He said gesturing greatly.

Suddenly the most unexpected person that Jean thought would help spoke up. It was Annie.

"Uhh… The lake…"

"What?"

"The lake…" She said looking away. "There is a wooden old port at the lake. There is a small boat. I sometimes go there at night… I don't know… It's probably just me."

Jean did not know if Annie was being truly serious or if she was trying to convince herself that doing the whole "plan" was just silly. Regardless, Armin snapped his head up excited.

"It's great! I know that place! You can confess your feelings aboard the small rowing boat that is there on the port, right in the middle of the lake, underneath the stars! You can even place candles all along the wooden railing of the small port! It would be awesomely romantic..."

"Are you sure?" Jean asked a little nervous about the whole situation.

He had never been on date before, much less such an elaborate one.

"Yeah, we could totally help you with it. After helping you setting up things we'll leave the two of you alone and go practice with our maneuver gear."

Jean brought himself to smile.

"Okay, sounds good. But guys, should I just wait at the port and just confess my feelings? Because right now I feel quite nerv-"

He was interrupted by Armin.

"Oi! quiet!"

Armin signaled Jean with his eyes to look back. And then, he turned back and saw her. She looked at him for only a second before shyly turning away, but that second of looking at those beautifull grey eyes was enough to give him all the certainty he needed.

_God you look so beautiful today… __You are always so strong Mikasa; I should probably learn from you and be a little stronger myself. I'll try my best to have courage, I promise you…_

"Alright!" Jean stated with passion to every member of the table. "I'll be waiting on the boat. When she comes, I'll tell her courageous trainee sent me to give her a present. As soon as we are sailing I'll confess my feelings…" He said it loud enough that everyone in the table were now a little startled.

Little did they know that he was feeling gut-ripping nervousness.

"So I'll tell her what I feel…"

He let out a huge breath.

"I'll do it, I won't doubt myself. What's should I do next?"

Christa saw the determination in Jean's eyes and it prompted her to speak up.

"You wait Jean…"

"I wait? Wait for what?"

There wasn't a trace of uncertanty in Christa's face when she answered.

"You wait until she tells you she loves you back…"

At that moment, Jean could not help but smirk. Marco patted him on his back and the Armin mumbled a 'Hell yeah!'

_So many "what if's" in my mind. But Christa is so sure… Alright! I'll trust you Christa! I'll do this tonight; I won't let you down guys!_

"Thank you." Jean told his friends with the most sincere voice anyone had ever heard out of him.

"Christa, today you'll deliver the second letter?"

"Yes, I will."

"Great, tell her to wait for me at the port two hours after the bell rings. I'll have everything ready by then."

"Of course, Jean."

He smiled at her and then smiled to himself.

_This is going to be a special night for me._

-x-

After dinner Jean, Eren and Marco snuck out of the cabin and went to the port to begin preparations for the meeting. Jean had put on the best clothes he had and Christa even lent him some of her rose perfume. They arrived at the left side of the lake with half an hour remaining until Mikasa was supposed to show up.

The small port consisted in just a narrow wooden floor that stretched a few meters into the lake. On the sides that were on firm land, thin, dried pine trees seemed to surround the port outside its wooden railings.

Marco, who had a torch and bag full of candles, started taking the candles out. He lit them up and gave them to the other two boys who placed those candles all along the port's wooden railings.

The dim illumination those candles gave to the whole place made it appear unusually romantic and sweet. This strange aura astonished Marco somewhat.

_God this is so beautiful. Armin's idea of using candles really paid off. That guy is always right._

After all the candles were set Jean, made sure the small white boat was firmly tied to the edge of the port, ready to depart on a any second into a night trip of love into the star-only illuminated lake.

Jean then jumped back to the wooden floor and was met by Marco's friendly back pat on his back.

"Well Jean…" He smiled."We are almost done. This is going to be a good night for you, don't you agree? "

Marco looked at is friend more closely. He noticed Jean had his eyes wide opened, was clenching his jaw and seemed like he was trembling.

"Oi, what's gone into you Jean? You look terrified…"

Jean looked at his friend and forced himself to smirk.

"You think so?" He answered sarcastically, to which Marco laughed slightly with hope of calming his friend. "Marco, it's just that all of this is a little too sudden for me. I'm a little worried."

Jean suddenly grabbed his friend's shoulders.

"What if Mikasa think all of this is stupid and gets angry?" He asked with trembling eyes and a seemingly broken voice.

"Jean , calm-"

"And what if I wasn't the guy she expected me to be and slaps me… or worse…."

He seemed to Marco as if Jean had just choked on his own breath.

"Or worse… she starts crying…"

"Jean! What's up with you?! Why so many doubts all of a sudden?"

Jean looked down, still terrified.

"I've been having doubts all along, it's just that… I've been very good at hiding them… But now the pain seems to have gotten worse, so much worse. My chest hurts so much…"

Marco opened his mouth and looked at his friend with his classic serene face that was so powerful it could make anyone in the world trust him.

"Jean, please don't worry! I know you can do this! We've come all this way and most of it was thanks to your bravery. Now, it's just a matter of being honest with her about your feelings… Jean, you've been through worse… this is just a little step."

Jean looked up at Marco with slightly more confidence.

"Alright Marco, I'll try to calm down."

He took deep breaths and slowly let go of Marco's shoulders. The boys looked at each other and smiled. Jean was feeling slightly better but his chest still felt compressed. None the less, he thanked Marco.

"Okay Marco, you are right, I have to trust myself!" He then began weirdly speaking to himself. "Just don't do something weird Jean, nothing weird at all. Just put on the smile you know how to fake so damn well and tell her… Ahhhrg damn it! I can't do it!"

His chest was literally killing him.

After saying that remark, Eren, who was leaning back against a railing in the middle of the port, started laughing mockingly.

"Haha, You are really something else Kirschtein…"

"What's so funny, Jaeger?"

"What's gotten you so nervous? It's just Mikasa you are going to speak to…"

Jean did not like Eren's smug remark and mumbled a "shut up" that only Marco heard.

"...I mean, not only are you wasting energy that could be used for training to fight the titans with this little plan of yours, but you are also nervous about it?"

Jean was starting to get irritated.

"Jaeger, I'm warning you..."

"You know, you not only call this training a farce that you need to go through to join the Military Police and avoid fighting… but you are also scared to talk to my sister?"

Jean was now looking at Eren with deadly intentions. Eren then gave the final push.

"It's because of people like you that we lost Wall Maria. People who do not have a spine."

"That's it Eren! I had enough!"

He stepped forward aggressively and grabbed Eren's shirt with both hands and pulled him in.

"You have no idea of what I'm going through, you big mouth!"

"Let go of me you idiot!"

Eren grabbed Jean's shirt in response and both starting pushing each other against the wooden railings, while looking at each other with hate in their eyes.

"Guys! Come on!"

Marco moved in to try to separate them.

The boy's wrestling was fierce, they pushed each other violently to the sides of the port and they even knocked some candles off the railings.

"You won't kick me this time Jaeger! I'm prepared!"

"You stupid idiot! Getting mad at me for telling the truth!"

Finally, after almost ripping each other's clothes and knocking quite a few candles that fell on the land, Marco managed to separate the two quarreling boys thanks to his bigger frame.

"Guys! Stop it!"

The other two boys still were trying to move forward and kill each other.

"Both of you, Knock it off!" Marco yelled while pressing a palm to each of the boy's chest to stop them from facing on. "This is pointless! Don't fight over this! We all know each of us have different reasons for being here and we have to-"

"Coward…" Eren mumbled, twisting Jean's face into one of anger.

"Enough Eren! As I was saying, we have to accept each other and try to be friends, alright?"

Eren and Jean looked away from each other.

"You guys are here together, for better or worse. Let's be try to be reasonable and understand each other's motives better, okay? Fighting won't accomplish anything…"

The boys grunted. Marco dropped his hands from their chests and pointed at Jean.

"Jean! You first…"

Jean sighed.

"Alright Marco… Jaeger, I'm sorry." He offered his hand with some dismay.

"Now you Eren." Marco said pointing at Eren.

"Fine, fine, I'm sorry too." He shook Jean's hand with an equal amount of disinterest.

Marco's smile came back to his face.

"See guys…" He said as he placed his hand on each of the boy's shoulders. "Now that we are all friends again, we'll be able to face future problems with much more-"

Suddenly, Marco's face turned into one of pure horror.

"HOLY SHIT!"

Jean and Eren quickly turned their heads to where Marco was looking, and both gasped with the same amount of horror at the sight.

"A pine tree is on fire! Get some water now!" Marco yelled desperately to snap Jean out of his surprise from seeing the tree at the side of the port burning brightly and completely.

Armin should have known that placing lit candles near dry trees is a horrendous idea.

"Oh crap, crap, crap! Jaeger, help me get some buckets!"

Eren was shocked too.

"Buckets?! We have no buckets here!"

"What are you talking about!? Yes we do!"

"Where?! I can't see them!"

"Damn it Jaeger, I don't know!"

Marco tried to take control of the situation.

"Guys! Use the hands, form them into a cup and throw some water to the fire!"

"That's stupid Marco! It won't go off that easily!"

"For god's sake Jean, the fire is growing! Let's do something!"

The three boys' began running to the shore of the lake on the side of the port and using their hands to carry the water. After running a couple of times, while stumbling around with water in their hands, the trainees, unsurprisingly, didn't stop the fire. It had already caught two trees and it was growing at a scary speed.

"Come on! Let's hurry before it spreads!" Jean yelled after he tossed with his hands a small amount of water.

"I know damn it!" Eren yelled back after throwing to the fire only drops of water from his hand because he most of it had fallen from them.

"Guys the fire has spread to another tree!" Marco desperately said after throwing, with a very unmanly motion, the minuscule amount of water he had in his hand. "I have an Idea! Use your shirts to hold water!"

"Hell no! This is my best shirt!"

Eren quickly took his shirt off.

"Damn it Kirschtein, just do what Marco says!"

"Argh! Fine!"

The three boys took their shirts off and began using them as containers for water. Marco's second idea was not very bright either, as most of the water would fall off the clothing before it could be thrown. The situation looked dire for the trainees.

"Marco! It's not working!" Eren yelled after fumbling with his wet shirt. "Now there are four trees on fire! We need to do something!"

The now shirtless Marco was trying to rack his brain.

"Now there are five trees on fire!" Jean snapped after throwing to the blaze only a cup of water from his shirt.

Despite the trainee's unprecedented heroism and determination as equipped-with-shirts-only-firefighters, their attempts to control the fire were not only futile but were mockingly ineffective. Marco grabbed both of his friend's shoulders in the midst of desperation and looked at them, defeated.

"Guys we can't handle this, let's get out of here now!"

Jean looked at Marco with fear in his eyes.

"Get out?! What about Mika-"

He was interrupted by a sudden cracking sound. The first tree that had been set of fire began to give indications that it was about to fall.

"Oh Shit! Let's go!"

Marco grabbed both Eren and Jean and pulled them out of the port.

As soon as they stepped off of the wooden floor, the fiery pine tree fell right on the middle of the port's wooden old floor, sealing its fate forever. The flame began spreading at an unbelievable speed.

The trainees could only step back and watch with horror from afar the now blazing inferno that was the whole area around the port.

Jean used his wet shirt to wipe the sweat from his face and sat on the grass. He then pressed the palm of his hand to his face and began shaking his head.

"This cannot be happening… Mikasa, please forgive me…"

_So much work and planning now gone to ashes.._. _Damn it! Damn it! Damn it!_

Eren let out a huge breath and sat a few meters away from Jean.

"Well at least the instructors are not going to find out about this until tomorrow." He said with a plain face.

"Jaeger!" Jean turned and looked at him angrily. "This is all your…" He stopped.

"Uhh never mind, it's pointless."

Marco, who was now wearing an unbuttoned soaked shirt, could not bear it any longer and let out a few giggles.

"Oi!" Jean called his attention but Marco was still giggling, now harder than before.

"Oi Marco! What's so funny? This is a disaster…"

"Well Jean…" Marco said in between his giggles. "It looks like your chances with Mikasa have just been… _burned! _HAHAHAHA_"_

He burst out laughing so hard he had to hold his stomach. The laughter was so strong it even began to grow on Eren.

"Idiot…" Jean mumbled at him with a small smirk.

"HAHAHAHAHAAAHAA"

"Come on Marco, this is not funny…"

Jean was trying unsuccessfully not to smile.

"…Mikasa is now going to think _Courageous trainee _is a pyromaniac!"

That comment made Marco laugh even harder. He wiped out his tears and began imitating Jean's voice.

"_Oh hello Mikasa, my name is Jean Kirschtein and my love for you burns so hard in my heart I even had a port set on fire… _HAHAH"

"Very funny Marco..."

Jean let out a few unwanted giggles.

"Idiot… that doesn't even make any sense."

Jean was trying so hard not to laugh but he couldn't help himself. It crept on him… Marco and Eren were still laughing like crazy while soaking wet and dirty, and seeing them like that made Jean let go of his worries.

_Idiots… haha… _

He should be feeling devastated from messing up in such a spectacular way. He should be feeling hopeless about Mikasa and her love. He should be feeling like a useless piece of trash.

But he wasn't feeling like that.

He was feeling surprisingly happy and seeing his friends laugh so hard at this silly situation compelled him to do the same.

_God, this feels good, haha._

After laughing a good couple of minutes, he stepped closer to Marco with a smile.

"You are truly insane Marco. Making me laugh right now."

"Ahh… come on!" He laughed, but after a few seconds he stopped and put a serious face. He knew they had to get back on the plan.

"Hey Jean, what are we going to do now?"

Jean sighed.

"Mikasa will come here in about twenty minutes and then run like hell after seeing that mess. She'll probably think the guy who wrote the letter is crazy."

He pointed at the fire that was still going strong.

"But…"

Jean grinned immensely and shrugged.

"… there is always a new plan, right Marco?"

"Hell yeah!"

"You and Eren had to help Armin with his maneuver gear tonight, right?"

"Yep."

"Well, I'll be of help too. Let's go."

The three boys began walking towards outskirts of the forest where Armin was supposed to be waiting for Marco and Eren to train. It should have been the walk of defeat for them, but instead it was the walk of making puns about fire. And after ten minutes of walking, joking around and "_You guys better improve your firefighting skills if you are to join the military police. You suck." _comments by Eren, Armin appeared; excited beyond belief when he saw the three boys coming.

"Jean!"

"What is it Armin?"

"You are here! How lucky are we?"

Armin was speaking as if there was a third person in the conversation.

"Uhh… I don't understand."

"The thing is…"

Armin stopped.

"Good god, what happened with you guys? You look like a mess."

"We had an… inconvenience…"

"Well it doesn't matter… There is someone that has been waiting for you for the past hour…"

"Uhh?"

Then _she_ appeared right behind him.

"Hello Jean." Mikasa said barely looking at him in the eye.

The oriental girl dressed in a white shirt, long skirt and scarf almost gave Jean a heart attack, but he managed to keep his composure.

"Oh hi, Mikasa." He answered with a smile. "W-what are you doing here?"

"Sorry to bother you. I know that you are going to help Armin right now. I was also supposed to be somewhere tonight…"

_Yes, our meet up…_

She sighed.

"… but I decided it would be best not to go."

_What!? She was not going to come to the port?! After all we've been through to do that meet up?_

Her expression tightened and Jean even saw slight nervousness appear on her face.

"I decided it would be best to spend some time with you. I need your help. Do you want to help me?"

Jean also noticed she was directing her glance away from Eren on purpose.

_What could be going on her mind right now? _Jean wondered,_ Whatever, but please say 'It would be best to spend some time with you' again. That was so nice to hear…_

Armin spoke up.

"Actually…Jean had to go to the forest to scout some good places to train near the lake. Why don't you guys go there while we get started over here?"

_Blatant liar… You are pretty damn __clever, Armin, did you know that?_

Mikasa was looking at the ground with a very slight little embarrassment that contrasted her usual dull expression.

"So…" Jean told her. "Shall we go Mikasa?"

Mikasa snapped her head up.

"Yeah…"

And just like so, Jean left with Mikasa right by his side towards the forest with a smile on his face. He was still a little sad about her willingly skipping their meet up, and was doubtful of her reasons to speak to him, but he honestly did not care too much. This was his golden chance, and he knew this was the time to make things right once in for all…

-x-

_To be continued…_


	11. Together in a Stalemate Part 1

Chapter 11

With the stars and the moon as their only source of illumination, they began taking their first steps into the huge forest.

Jean could barely see a few feet in front of him and the sound of his footsteps were accompanied by the strong buzzing of the cicadas. He used the opportunity the environment provided to inconspicuously get closer to Mikasa, walking by her side with only a minuscule distance between their shoulders.

Mikasa had not said a word ever since they had left and Jean had barely gotten a look at her face. Her downward glare made her locks block her face when looked at from the side.

It was a very casual walk; they both took slow footsteps but Jean noticed that Mikasa's stride was getting heavier. It was starting to slow the pace of the walk. Jean's smile was quickly disappearing.

_Uhh… Mikasa is doubtful. I better do something._

As he walked, Jean turned his head very slightly to his side and lowered his voice so much that Mikasa barely heard him.

"Thank you Mikasa." He turned his head a little more towards her. "Thank you for trusting me with this."

Her only response was side glare that lasted two seconds. There wasn't a single change in her expression.

_Argh… damn it!_

They kept walking as if nothing had happened. Jean's smile was now definitely gone. Maybe a new topic of conversation would interest her.

"Ehh… Mikasa, when I watched you during physical exercise training… I mean… It's not like I was watching you on purpose… I was just passing by and… ehh… when you were doing sit-ups I noticed that a lot of girls cheered for you; how many did you do?"

Without a change in her glare, Mikasa answered after quite a few seconds.

"A hundred and twenty."

Jean could not help but be stunned.

_A hundred and twenty?! I did fifty and my midsection felt like it was on fire. What the hell is this girl made of?_

"Oh… I see."

They kept walking. The physical closeness was there, but Jean kept feeling that there was something that stood in between them and distanced them away. He still kept peppering Mikasa with short side glances though, with hope of seeing something come out of her. Perhaps a small smile or a gesture or anything really.

_Damn it! I'm walking blind over here._

"Jean."

Jean made an effort not to showcase his surprise.

"Yeah?"

"Where are we going?"

He was not going anywhere the burning port. In fact he wanted to go to the opposite side of the lake.

_I bet she'll love the view that the shore of the lake provides at midnight._

"Uhh… towards the shore of the lake… We are fifteen minutes away."

Mikasa gave another one of her short side glances.

"Okay."

Silence took over them once more. Jean sighed to himself; the conversation was dead again.

_Damn it! There has got to be something that sparks her attention… something she'll want to talk about, something she cares about. But, damn it, what could it be?_

The answer came to Jean's head but he did not like it at all.

_No, not that topic. Everything but that topic. I refuse to bring that up. There has to be something else. Think Kirschtein! Use that head of yours!_

His head was very uncooperative. Nothing else came to his mind.

_I am going to hate myself for this._

"So, Eren has been really looking happy, don't you agree?"

Her face tightened at those words. Jean's plan had backfired, but he didn't realize. The darkness hid her face from him. He continued.

"I mean he gets beaten to pulp but he smiles more often. I've even heard that Annie once kicked him in the balls but, after almost puking from the pain, he got up with a smile. I'm sure you have noticed he's different."

_I've just disgusted myself but this surely gets her speaking. At least we'll have something to share our thoughts on._

"Jean… stop it."

"What is it? Eren is happy. Aren't you too?"

She raised her voice while still keeping her monotone.

"You are an idiot."

She kept walking as if what she had just said was inconsequential, but Jean did not view it like that.

He stopped walking and folded his arms across his chest. He saw as Mikasa kept walking quite a few feet until she realized he had stopped. She only turned her head slightly to meet his eyes. When they finally matched, Mikasa once again found herself under his powerful gaze.

"What the hell is your problem Mikasa?"

She stood in her place. Jean could feel her eyes carefully exploring his.

"You've been like this for almost twenty minutes… I hate it when people get so… so distant… so unfriendly."

She turned around to face him straight. Jean noticed her eyes were slightly narrowed as she observed him.

"Mikasa… come on… just talk to me…"

"What do you care?"

Jean sighed deeply.

"What do I care? I don't understand you Mikasa. Actually, I think I never really understood you."

That comment did spark a reaction. She let out a small breath through her teeth and looked away from him. She immediately meet his gaze again.

"You are not the only one who feels like that…"

Jean raised his voice.

"Ahh so you also don't understand me?! That's just great… I'm not really that complicated. You know? I'm beginning to doubt your good judgment."

"Idiot."

"So tell me… what is with Eren that bothers you that much? That he spends more time with Annie than with you… Oh I see, you are a jealous sister… You don't like your little brother to be away from you. That is why you are always so distant to everyone else… You are angry because-"

"Shut up Jean… It has nothing to do with Eren."

Jean unfolded his arms and placed them in his pockets.

"Then please, god damn it, could you explain why-"

"It's something you did!"

"What the hell did I do?"

"You took him away from me! Neither Eren or Armin have spoken to me in three days and it's because you are so popular with them and you also-"

"Me?! Popular?"

"And you also convinced them that I'm not a good person to be around! I know you did!"

Jean's eyes were wide open.

"What the hell Mikasa?! What's wrong with you?"

"Ahh… don't give me that 'what is wrong with you'. You did it on purpose. It's obvious that you did it. I don't know why. Besides, you also made fun of me at the race. I know you cheated…"

Jean chuckled.

"…and then made Eren laugh at me with that 'offer me training lessons' thing you said. Seriously, who the hell do you think you are Jean Kirschtein!?"

He looked down with disheartened expression.

_I'm Courageous trainee._

"Mikasa, if you hate me so damn much, then why did you ask me for help? What do want from me?"

Mikasa's face riddled with sadness at those words.

The cicadas covered their silence.

Jean stared at her blankly for a good few seconds. He then smiled at her, even if she was looking away.

_It's alright Mikasa, don't worry about it, I know what to do._

The feeling in his chest was not gone, but he didn't care anymore. He took a big breath and stepped forward casually. He was getting closer and closer to Mikasa and noticed that at every step he took, her expression worsened.

Now closer, he took a good look at her. He then placed both of his hands tightly around her shoulders. She did not react to his touch, but it didn't deter him. He spoke up in a cutting voice.

"Mikasa, I'm sorry..."

Her eyes glared at him. He put on the smile he knew would show Mikasa what he truly feels about her.

"I never wanted to hurt you nor cause you pain. I would never say anything bad about you. If you still want my help, I'll give it my all. To be completely honest with you I…"

_I really care about you, Mikasa._

He was interrupted before he could finish.

"Jean… I… I don't hate you."

Jean's face stayed the same, but he did feel something brighten inside.

"It's just been a couple of hard days for me, that's all..."

He dropped his hands from her shoulders but kept his smile.

"Don't worry about it."

Jean could have sworn he saw her smile for half a second before she quickly erased it from her face.

"Jean, will you still help me?"

"Of course. What is it that's bothering you?"

"I just… I just want to get my friends back. Can you help me with that?"

Jean laughed to himself. An awesome idea had just entered his mind.

"Yeah, but on one condition. I'll tell you later about it, alright?"

He took a few steps forward and looked at her with an expecting smile.

"Right now let's get to the shore."

Mikasa nodded and continued walking along with him, shoulders almost touching.

Jean enjoyed every second of having Mikasa right by his side, and his eyes were always shifting towards her. To him, she was the most beautiful thing in the world, and while he was afraid he would walk into a tree, he just couldn't keep his eyes to himself. Many of his glances were directed towards her midsection.

_That thing must be made out of steel. God, I still can't believe she did a hundred and twenty sit-ups. _

He wasn't sure if Mikasa knew how much he was staring at her, perhaps she was oblivious to the fact, or perhaps she didn't mind being looked at. Either way, Jean was still happy to be dazzled by her at such a close distance.

Now, Jean no longer felt he was walking alone through the darkness of the forest.

Finally, they arrived at the shore.

_I was right… this is beautiful._

He approached the water and took a good sniff at the moisture filled air. He opened his eyes and recognized something barged-shaped that was lying at the shore at a small distance from him.

_Is that what I think it is? No way…_

He ran towards the object. His assumption was right. It was the boat he had left at the port. He began looking at it carefully and saw that the rope that held it had been burnt.

He smiled.

"Oi Mikasa."

Mikasa approached him.

"Yeah?"

"Look what I found… Do you want to do something crazy?"

-x-

_To be continued…_


	12. Together in a Stalemate Part 2

Chapter 12

_Why did I even say yes to him?_

She again found herself very close to Jean. Physically, at least. The boat, which its white color couldn't be distinguished in the dark, was barely big enough for both of them.

Mikasa was sitting at one end of the boat, facing him as he held the paddles and rowed backwards; their knees almost touching from the closeness.

Jean was slowly pushing the shimmering water back with his two paddles; pulling at a very gradual pace, the boat into the centre of the lake. Mikasa could still see his features thanks to the light the starts provided.

Both of them had remained silent ever since she had agreed to go on this, as he put it, "small trip to recon the area."

She broke the silence.

"Jean."

He took his eyes from the paddles to look at her.

"Hmm?"

"It smells as if something nearby is burning."

"Oh… I..."

Mikasa thought the reaction he showed on his face was quite a bit more elaborate than it needed to be.

"I can't smell anything… Something burning… really weird… Where is it coming from? Are you completely sure Mikasa?"

_Yes I'm pretty sure that I can smell it Jean. And I'm also pretty sure you are lying to me._

Mikasa let out a sigh.

"Forget I said a thing."

"Oh… Okay…"

He kept rowing, almost looking relieved. Now he was seemingly heading to another place that did not have the smell in the air. He did not continue the conversation.

_Why isn't he talking? I can't stand the sounds that the water makes anymore. What's up with him?_

She remembered a reason.

"Jean, are you sure you don't hate me?"

"Uhh?"

Mikasa leaned to her side and and grabbed a handful of water with her hand, almost as if she was trying to ignore the whole thing.

"Come on Mikasa, don't be silly… did you honestly think I would steal your friends from you? I never imagined you thought that badly of me."

She let out a long and profound sigh.

"I still don't know much about you Jean."

She finally saw him smirk.

"Neither do I Mikasa. Neither do I. Don't think that's a good thing, now is it?"

She had to blink a couple times to let that fully sink in.

_He's back to his usual self. I still don't understand him._

A small wave shook the boat slightly. Mikasa remained completely still but she saw that Jean was gripping the paddles tightly.

When the movement stopped, he released the paddles slowly and looked at her.

"You remember the condition I talked to you about? I want to get to know you a little better; that's the condition."

"Ehh… why?"

"Do my reasons to get to know you better matter? I just want to know more about your past."

Her blank expression suddenly returned to her face. As soon as he noticed, Jean rolled his eyes.

"What is it this time? I'm pretty sure you had a good childhood."

Mikasa winced at those words.

"No Jean, I didn't."

"Care to explain?"

_Jean…_

"No. Not yet."

"Oh… I see..."

Mikasa saw him smirk at her softly.

"… I don't mind then."

"Jean… were you always like this?"

"Always?"

"I believed you didn't care about anyone but yourself."

Jean rolled his eyes again while curling his lips up.

"You mean that because I'm joining the Military Police, right?"

"Ehh…"

_No, that's not it._

"…Yes, that's why."

"Well then, let me explain my reasons."

He kept speaking but his tone was now tainted by what Mikasa could only perceive as resentment.

"There aren't a lot of choices in Trost for a poor kid with no family. To be a merchant, you need lots of money. So for me, it was either going to work in the factories ten hours a day or go to the farms."

"I see."

"The man who took care of me allowed me to have a small job at his bar, getting drinks to tables for tips. Two years ago, a member of the Military Police came in, and after I served him some drinks, he wouldn't stop yapping about how good his life was in the interior. He described me how the members of Military Police ate only the most delicious food, were respected and awed by the society and had lots of leisure time. He was quite a funny guy too."

"Oh."

"You can figure out the rest. As soon as I could, I joined the army…"

He shrugged with a big smile. Mikasa did not view this gesture as arrogant; she would describe it as sincere.

"…now here I am. I don't really think coming to this training was awfully conceited of me."

Mikasa nodded at him and then pushed her locks away from her face to look at him with penetrating eyes.

"You like seeing me…"

"Uhh?"

"I said that you like seeing me…"

"I don't unders-"

Her tone was now more combative.

"You do, don't you? I have seen the look on your face when I use my maneuver gear."

She did get a reaction out of him, but what Jean did was not quite what she had expected.

_Is he… laughing?_

Jean's laughter was high-pitched, drawn out and child like.

_That wasn't meant to be funny. Why are you laughing?_

He waved most of his outburst with his arm.

"See, haha, that's why I wanted to get to know you better, Mikasa."

"Uhh?"

"I didn't have a chance to meet savvy girls back in my home town. You were quite a surprise for me when I first saw you. Maybe somewhat of an enigma as well."

His smile grew at her puzzlement. He pointed at her with his index finger.

"You are awesome Mikasa!"

She had to blink a couple times again and felt herself looking away.

"Jean… please… What are you saying?"

A small glare of hers was directed at his face. Almost reluctantly, she admitted to herself that his childish, self-indulgent smile was heartwarming.

"Okay, okay sorry…"

His expression did not change.

"…but you are not going to change my mind."

Mikasa hissed at him.

_Idiot._

"Ahhh Mikasa! You are smiling at me! Should I consider myself honored?"

"Shut up. If you are trying to be funny you are failing."

Not terribly disturbed by her comment, Jean let go of the paddles and looked away. Mikasa thought that the way he looked at the water was quite…

.._.odd. What is he thinking?_

The so dreaded sounds the water made were the only things she heard for what it seemed like an eternity. She looked at the floor of the boat while she waited.

Finally, he talked.

"Do you think I'm brave?"

Mikasa carefully observed his features.

_He's so relaxed, but so distant too. I don't get him._

He spoke again before she could think of an answer. His tone was deeper than before.

"You are joining the Survey Corps. I know you are."

"So?"

Jean narrowed his eyes as he stared at her.

"'So?' You want to die? Everyone knows what happens to them."

"I won't die."

"Pfff… lately I've wondered if you are, in fact, a human. Sadly, I know you are. And you are not invincible."

"Does it bother you where I go?"

"To be honest with you…"

Mikasa then saw him folding his arms and narrowing his eyes even more. She could feel the tension.

"…yes, it does. A lot."

He looked away again and returned to rowing the boat slowly. Mikasa though he was trying to distract himself from the subject.

_Why do you care Jean?_

He spoke again.

"It's not so much that you are risking your life, it's the reason behind doing so. I know that you care about the outside world and fighting the titans as much as I do. You are just being dragged by your brother into joining that suicidal group. I'm right, aren't I?"

She took a good look at him with her expressionless face.

"I have to follow him. He _is_ my family. And-"

"No, he's _not_. As you said, I like seeing you. You don't have to be a genius to realize that you are not his sister. Not a real one, at least. Every trainee has already figured that out. Come on, what's the real reason?"

_Jean…_

Mikasa started sulking.

_He really is trying to get to know me. Jean…_

"The real reason is…"

She folded her arms, shrunk her body and looked at the floor of the boat.

"…Eren saved my life once. He then made me a part of his family and cared for me…"

She did not look at his face while saying her next words.

"… and I love him for that."

She kept looking down for quite a few seconds; only feeling the silence the night provided and the soft movements the boat made from being hit by small waves.

When she slowly raised her head to look at him, she only saw his back. He had turned away from her for some reason. Now, it seemed as if he was looking at a distant point in the horizon. He only whispered to her, with a slightly broken voice.

"You love him Mikasa?"

"I do."

His eyes still directed to infinity.

"You love him or… are you in love with him?"

A considerable wave shook the boat, making their bodies aggressively lean to their side. This time Mikasa did grip the sides of the vessel to hold herself. Jean quickly grabbed the paddles and controlled the boat until it stopped moving. When it finally did and calmness was back, Jean looked at Mikasa; his face not completely visible to her.

"I'm sorry Mikasa. Forget it. It's just that I want to… well… you know what Mikasa?"

"Uhh?"

"I just…"

Jean awkwardly leaned forward and placed his right knee on the wood board where she was sitting, making her legs slightly to the left. Both of their legs were touching at various places.

She could not single out any emotions from his face.

Mikasa then saw his right hand slowly going into his pocket and pulling out a small, white flower. She could tell it was a little roughed up, but for some reason, under the dark lighting that stars provided, it seemed like it glowed.

Jean looked at the flower and a small, soft smile appeared on his face.

_God… what is he thinking?!_

His eyes then darted towards her in a sudden motion. Her heart started racing. He was close, way too close. He held his deep gaze for a good few seconds.

It was too much for her heart to handle. She quickly looked to her side.

_What in god's name is this idiot doing? _

She still felt that his eyes were locked on her. His glare was starting to get her breathing hitched.

_Please, stop looking at me like that._

Mikasa now had to protest but, she was only able to say in a drawn out whisper.

"Jean…"

She cursed herself for not being able say something else. Her eyes moved quickly to his body, just for a few moments, to then look away once more.

_Perhaps it was enough. He will surely get the hint._

She felt a hand softly touch the side of her face. Her yelp was interrupted by his voice.

"Just hold still."

His left hand delicately held her jaw and slowly moved her head to make her face him. Mikasa didn't put up resistance but her eyes were still looking away to the side. It was her form of protection.

"Oi."

Her eyes locked with his, almost as if they had responded to his call without her consent. His face was dangerously close to hers; he was not smiling, in fact Mikasa thought she was looking at a mirror.

"I just want to…"

While still holding her face, he used his right hand that was holding the flower, to place some of her locks behind her ear. Then, Mikasa observed him as he calmly, almost as if following a rhythm, placed the flower on top of her ear. She felt her heart pound on her ribs.

He quickly pulled his face back but his hand held on to her face for much more seconds that it was necessary.

He finally dropped the hand from her face and sat back. Jean then stared shamelessly at her with that cocky smile of his; it was honestly too much for her. Her calmness was gone and her heart was nowhere near slowing down.

"Sorry about that Mikasa. It looks beautiful on you, I couldn't let the opportunity to see you like that go."

"Jean, I realized."

"Uhh?"

"You _are_ courageous after all…"

Mikasa could not quite catch his face at her words; her eyes were everywhere but on him.

She felt the boat start to move again. She glanced at the sides and saw that the shore, while still far, was getting closer.

_He's getting back to the shore._

"Mikasa…"

Her eyes, again against her will, looked at him but his eyes were not looking back.

"…maybe I am."

After that, both of them kept quiet until they arrived at the shore.

-x-

To be continued...


	13. Together in a Stalemate Part 3

Chapter 13

Jean and Mikasa stepped out of the boat silently. Jean pulled the boat to the shore and tied what was left of the rope to a tree.

_Thanks buddy, you've done a good job. It's not your fault._

She was looking down, her arms were crossed and her face was blank. Jean could not quite see her eyes.

He approached her.

"So… shall we go back?"

She did not answer.

_Mikasa…_

He just let out a short sigh and started walking away from her.

_I don't want to think about it anymore._

He stepped into the forest and her footsteps were right behind him. Jean didn't want to turn around. He kept walking without looking back.

_As long as I know she's safe… hell... who am I kidding? She's fine on her own… but still, I would feel so joyful if, at least for one moment, I could feel like I'm protecting her._

Jean expected this walk to be the most awkward of his life.

_God, walking quietly with her right behind me, not saying a word… it's so… bad._

When they began approaching the darkest part of the forest, like a glimmer of hope, Jean felt a soft tug in his right shirt sleeve.

"Jean."

Neither of them stopped walking. Mikasa walked with him while grabbing his sleeve with her left hand. After a few steps, her whispers began.

"You didn't tell me…"

"Uhh?"

"… how do I get my friends back…"

She might as well have physically hurt him, but the darkness and the shadows from the tall trees kept his face hidden from her view.

_Argh… fuck… That's all the use I have for you, right? _

"Jean…"

_Ah… the hell, if it keeps her whispering my name like that, I might as well help her._

"You are not very confident, Mikasa…"

She kept silent.

_I'll help you with that…_

"What you have to do is... just let me think for a second…"

"Jean…"

"The plans that are simple are the best. Meet Eren at breakfast and…"

_I'll be damned._

"…give him a big hug and tell him you are sorry; that you are not going to do it anymore."

"Do what?"

"That's not the point. The point is to make him feel near to you. Then sit and have breakfast with him like nothing happened. That's your best bet."

"Jean… I don't know…"

"You'll have to risk it."

"I... get... nervous when I hug people."

_God, she's so cute…_

"Never thought I'd hear you say it, Mikasa."

"Uhh?"

"Never mind… can you do stuff even if you are nervous?"

"Yes. It's just… I've only been hugged by my mother."

"Only your mother? Didn't Jeag- ehh... Eren ever hug you?"

She did not answer.

"That's not good Mikasa... hell, I've even hugged Marco a couple of times. "

Again, she did not answer.

_Okay, this is getting awkward… I have an idea but maybe it is too much…_

For the first time since they had entered the forest, Jean turned his head around to look at her. Once more, her glare was downward.

_Oh god… this opportunity is too good, but really should I? Well… Christa said I should give girls confidence, and right now Mikasa seems pretty unconfident, so…_

He gave her one last hopeful glance.

… _I'm doing it… let's see where this goes…_

"Oi Mikasa, you are a fast learner, right?"

"Yes."

Jean turned his body around to face her, yanking the grip she had on his shirt sleeve.

"Now, don't worry, just close your eyes…"

"No. Why should-"

"Just do it… It'll be the best for you. You'll learn how to get your friends back."

"Jean… I…"

"Close them."

Mikasa gave him a look that made his heart shake a little but, luckily for him, she complied and sealed her eyes shut.

"Now, don't peek."

Jean stepped forward and placed his hand on her shoulders, pretty much the same way he had done before but this time, she did flinch at the contact.

"Keep 'em closed."

He then slid his hands down through her arms and, with a sudden step forward, he gave her a tight hug over her arms. It was a bit of an awkward bear hug, but what thrilled Jean the most was how close his head was to hers; his ear almost touching her cheek.

Jean now needed to hide this sudden affectionate move in some logical way. He whispered; his mouth so very close to her ear.

"Now this is what you need to do. It's something that makes the other person feel close to you."

He wouldn't have called his whisper a very romantic one, but it did make shivers travel down her body. Jean could hardly contain the excitement when he felt them.

_My god, I made her shiver… that was the most awesome thing I've ever done in my life._

He heard her mumble, "Jean…"

He pulled his face back while still holding her, and when he took a good look at her…

Pure sadness, resent and hatred combined all at once to form the expression her face showed.

_No, it can't be… Mikasa, why are you looking like this?_

Jean quickly let go of her and stepped back. He could not bring himself to look at her while she was like that. He then remembered something.

"…_and I love him for that."_

"_You love him Mikasa?"_

"_Yes I do."_

His next words were accompanied by a broken tone that shined with despair.

"So…"

Her eyes barely moved.

"... do that and you will get Eren back. Let's get going."

He turned around without waiting to see her reaction and kept walking. Slow footsteps followed him again.

_I fooled myself. I will never be able to reach for her heart. Damn it, I… I… don't even hate Jaeger… I'm just… uhh… sad that Mikasa and I are both alone in this._

He kept walking without a looking back. He didn't even mind her footsteps, his thoughts were overtaking him.

_Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe if we can make another plan that works. Damn it, or maybe I should just say what I feel right here… but what if she… and maybe if I wait I should… argh! God… I… just wish I knew what to do next…_

He put his hands in his pockets.

_If she won't ever love me… I should just give up. _

He glanced back at her to then immediately look ahead.

_No… that's what cowards do. You are right Marco; there is always a new plan. There is always a way into someone's heart. But then again, what if that person's heart is already taken? She loves him. God, I really wish someone would tell me what to do. In the meantime, I'll figure out something. I will make her stop loving him. Someway. Right now, let's just get back to the camp._

He kept walking with a hopeful smirk for quite a while. His attention then returned to the footsteps that were strangely getting closer and closer to him.

He felt a hand tug at his right shirt sleeve… again.

"Jean…"

He didn't stop; he kept walking as he had, with Mikasa gripping his shirt as she followed.

_God, this is good, really good... no… this is just... information. Alright Jean, think like Armin. Perhaps she did this to tell me something. That she cares for me? Maybe… That she is afraid of walking alone? A possibility, not likely though… That she just wants me close? I don't know._

Because of Armin's constant mentioning and praising of the book "Defense and Peace" Jean had skimmed it through. If he were to compare his current situation with Mikasa with a military situation, he would consider a stalemate the best choice of comparison.

"_A stalemate is a situation in which the two belligerents refuse to retreat but are also reluctant to attack. The situation is deadlocked."_

_A perfect metaphor. None of us can step up and say what we are feeling without the risk of losing the war with the other one._

She looked so fragile to him right now, so vulnerable, so…

… _takeable. Maybe this is my chance to attack._

However, he also remembered some words from the book.

"_During a stalemate, the most appropriate course of action is not to attack. Every soldier must remember that attacks leave one's side vulnerable. The risk is too big. To wait out, until certainty of a victory can be achieved, is advisable."_

He looked at her again; the flower she still kept in her ear glowed defiantly, apparently transferring some of the light into his heart.

It's time to decide, to attack or not to attack?

_The choice is obvious for me._

Only looking at her had made the choice obvious.

_Screw theory! I'm not any regular soldier! I'm Courageous trainee Mikasa! I'll never forget that!_

He stopped walking, making Mikasa stop with him. He then half turned towards her and with his left hand he grabbed Mikasa's left arm, gently pushing it away from its grip on his shirt.

She reacted to this sudden touch.

"Oh… I'm sorry, I didn't mean-"

"It's alright."

He stepped forward and grabbed her left hand with his right hand, interlocking some fingers with her.

"Uhh… Jean..."

"Mikasa…"

His left hand went again for her jaw and moved her head towards him.

_Okay, this is it…_

He began slowly leaning in. He was going for the kiss. He wanted her lips on his… so bad… It was literally killing him. He kept his eyes opened as his face traveled.

About half way, her lips only inches from his, the look of complete, utter terror in her face stopped him.

_Damn it!_

He slowly pulled his face back, trying not to make it awkward for both.

_I knew it! It was so stupid of me, I should have waited… She doesn't want me to… wait a second…_

He noticed something interesting.

_Her hand is still locked with mine… she didn't pull it away… does she like it? Does she like holding my hand? _

"Mikasa, I… I want to… ehh… there is about twenty minutes of walking until we arrive at the camp, and I… I want to hold your hand while we walk. Is it okay?"

He waited one… two… three…four seconds…

_Please answer me…_

Five… six… seven… eight…

_Damn it._

Nine… ten… eleven… twelve…

_Answer me._

At the thirteen's second, her face did change.

_It's a…. a… a smile! She smiled! She smileeeed! God… yes, yes, YES!_

"Let's go Mikasa."

He slowly began walking while holding her hand.

And a few seconds later, he turned his head to look at her with a smile he didn't know he had on his face.

And once again, her smile was gone; it had already been replaced by the dull and sad expression.

_No… Not again._

Jean's smile was now gone too.

_Fucking stupid stalemate. I hate you Armin and I hate "Defense and Peace." _

His thoughts were interrupted when he felt a soft squeeze in his hand. All previous insecurities were effectively erased. A shiver went down his spine, erupting goosebumps all over his body.

_That felt so… good… well, who am I to complain? I'm walking while holding Mikasa's hand. Her skin is so smooth…_

Sadly for Jean, he had to learn that time can pass way too fast… and for him, it did. Jean and Mikasa found themselves looking over at the main camp in no time.

The main camp consisted only of 6 cabins. Those cabins were located in somewhat of a huge pit, from which you had to climb up a considerable amount of land to sneak out and slide down to get in again. Tonight, there was only one lit torch in the hole camp. Its light could be seen from where Mikasa and Jean were standing. Torches lit at night were a very rare occurrence.

As soon as they approached the edge of the pit, Mikasa let go of his hand without being very visibly affected.

_Well... it was good while it lasted. I wonder if she enjoyed it…_

"Jean, let's get down."

"Oh... okay."

Mikasa sat at the edge, about to slide down to get in the camp. Jean was going to offer assistance, but again, with Mikasa, it would be redundant.

"Alright, I'm going down…"

"Mikasa wait!"

"What?"

"Look at that torch… right there… it seems like someone nearby is doing… oh god."

Mikasa's eyes squinted when they looked at the torch. She managed to make out that right next to it there was a...a...

… _Shirtless bald man doing push-ups. _

Jean started giggling while muffling his mouth.

"Jean, what is going on?"

"There is a rumor among the trainees that because of nightmares, Keith Shadis doesn't sleep. Instead, he gets out to the camp and trains all night. Because of that, his eyes look like two big black spots…"

The mysterious bald guy was now doing circles with his hip.

"… I swear I thought it was only a silly rumor, but it looks like…"

The bald guy then picked up the torch and started running laps that circled the sleeping cabins. Shadis identity was confirmed when Mikasa and Jean saw his goatee.

"…it's true."

"Oh."

Jean then sat next to Mikasa; cold wind was blowing into their bodies.

"It seems like we are trapped out here Mikasa. If we get down now, he'll spot us."

Mikasa then looked at him with what, for the first time, he recognized as a slightly vulnerable face; usually only reserved for Eren to see.

"Jean… I'm tired."

"Oh."

_She… is… waiting for me to tell her what to do… and I'm just so… puzzled…_

"Look, there's a small tree back here. We can sit over there and wait until Shadis finishes his...ehh… midnight workout."

She kept quiet.

Jean assumed that that was a yes. He stood up, walked a few steps back and sat on the bark of the tree. After a few seconds, Mikasa stood up and did the same, sitting at his left side; centimeters separating both of their shoulders.

She then pulled her knees towards her chest and rested her chin on her legs.

Jean stared at her with his eyes only.

_Why is she looking so confused? Maybe she likes me… but she also told me, without hesitation, that she loves him… damn it… and damn this stupid stalemate. I wish I could just read her mind…_

She buried her head into her legs, hiding her eyes from him.

_She looks so unconfident…_

"Oi, Mik."

She scarcely eyed him.

"Mik?"

"It's your new nickname Mikasa, I love how it sounds."

"Jean… I'm going to ask you one last time…"

Her voice, barely a whisper.

"…why do you care?"

"I wish we could repeat what happened tonight another time. I won't call you Mik if you don't like it. What do you say?"

"Forget it. I mean… just thank you."

She then looked away, almost as if the gesture was signaling a closure to the subject.

'_Thank you?'... What the hell does that mean? It's a yes or a no? uhh… not again, damn it, not again trapped in a stalemate… _

Jean turned his head towards her.

_Whatever…_

"Mikasa, you did well tonight. I'm going to sleep. I'm tired too. Wake me up if you see Shadis leaving."

He folded his arms, leaned more of his bodyweight back into the tree and closed his eyes.

What he had just said was a lie; he was not going to sleep, he was going to rack his brain for ideas. Ideas on how to break through this wall he felt he had with her and maybe a way to figure her, and this whole situation, out.

_Okay, Kirschtein, think, think! THINK!_

He was breathing deeply and slowly. He was faking it though; he didn't want her to know that he was awake.

_How could I ever fall asleep, while I'm having you by my side?_

And Jean had noticed that Mikasa was also pretty restless. Ever since he had closed his eyes, he had heard her constantly sighing, shifting into many different positions and ripping tiny amounts of grass off the land and throwing them into the wind.

His head never helped him when he needed it the most. Fifteen minutes had passed since he had closed his eyes, and not a single bright idea had entered his mind. He was starting to feel drowsy, but remained ultra aware of his environment.

After a while, he started to feel something strange. It was very hard for him to be sure with his eyes closed, but his intuition told him he was right.

_Her eyes are currently on me, I can feel it. I know she's looking at me._

Jean then felt slow movement next to him. A tiny breeze of warm air then hit his cheek. He recognized what it was right away.

_Her breathing; she is breathing all over my face. What is she doing?_

Her warm breath then began to hit him in different parts of his face. His eyes were closed so he could only imagine what was going on. His heart was racing and a huge effort was needed to keep pretending to be asleep.

_She is observing me closely from different angles… she is just… looking at me closely. What is she trying to see?_

The warm breezes disappeared. It relaxed jean, but it also left him puzzled.

_I would like to know what she was trying to see, because that was-_

There was a sudden contact on his shoulder. Another shoulder was pressing against it with a considerable amount of bodyweight behind it.

_Mikasa… you are-_

Sudden contact on his shoulder again. This time it was a head… a head was resting against his upper shoulder.

_Oh god._

He opened his eyes; he had to.

And then, he saw her. Leaning against him and resting her head on his shoulder with her eyes closed.

_Mikasa… you attacked…_

Her hair was at a very small distance from his cheek. Again, a golden chance was in front of him.

He knew Mikasa was awake. He let out a huge breath that he hoped she would recognize as a signal. Jean then, slowly, rested his own head on hers; cheek touching her hair.

_You hair smells like pure life._

Mikasa did not stay still either. As soon as his head was on hers, she let out a big breath similar to Jean's. After that, he felt her whole body relax while resting itself on him.

Perhaps they had said to each other what they could not say with words, allowing them the privilege of total deniability.

Jean did not mind though. It had been a long day, and he felt himself relaxing with her into a deep sleep. Keith was still going strong with his running.

His last thought before succumbing into that relaxation left a very silly smile on his face.

_The stalemate is over._

_-x-_

_To be continued…_


	14. Cannons and sleep

Chapter 14

"Jean…"

_Mikasa?_

"Jean, wake up. It's morning already."

He slowly opened his eyes and the first thing he saw was her face. She was bent over; her dull and observant face was hovering over him.

_What an awesome way to wake up…_

"Yeah, yeah, I'm getting up."

The first few sun rays were starting to appear from the horizon. The sun was barely an orange spot on the dark blue sky.

Jean quickly stood up and sat with Mikasa at the edge of the pit.

"Let's go down Jean."

"What happened with Shadis, has he left already?"

"When I woke up, I saw him passed out on the ground. After a while, he slowly stood up and dragged himself towards his cabin. I think he was grunting too."

Jean could not help but chuckle.

"Nice."

They both quickly went down into the pit. The walk was silent until it was time for each one to go to their respective cabins.

"So… ehh… see you at breakfast Mikasa."

"Okay."

They parted ways without goodbye glances. Regardless, he kept watching as she walked to her cabin.

_Well, I guess I can't want that much from you right now._

Jean then entered his cabin. All the trainees were slowly getting up and putting their 3DMG uniforms. He went to his locker to get changed and saw Marco. He was already changed but something was odd about him.

Marco's eyes seemed like two big black spots and his face looked massively worn out.

"Oi, Marco, everything good with Armin?"

Marco did his best to get rid of his sleepy expression.

"He now has a beautiful scratch on his forehead that will probably forever be a scar. Beyond that, he'll make it through the race. How did it go with Mikasa?"

Jean pressed his hand to his face and let out a few giggles of joy.

"Where do I start? It has been a long night…"

He pulled the hand out of his face.

"But good god Marco, are you okay? You look destroyed."

"It's been a long night for me too."

-x-

"…and then Shadis saw us from the camp. I told Armin to quickly put out our torch but it was already too late. Shadis began running up the pit and he chased us for about two hours before he finally gave up. By then, we were stranded in the middle of the forest."

Marco was having a hard time keeping his eyes open while eating his breakfast.

"Wow, that was… strange...hey… hey! Don't fall asleep on your breakfast! It's meant to be eaten!"

"I'm sorry but I didn't enjoy a nice night of sleep with a beautiful girl on my shoulder like others over here…"

Jean frowned.

"…we spent the night running away from a stupid bald guy."

"Wow, sour mood you are in today."

"Yeah, sorry 'bout that. Speaking of Mikasa, where is she now?"

"I don't know… she is supposed to be here for breakfast."

"Oh look, there she is."

Mikasa entered the cafeteria fully uniformed, with her dishes on her hands and an unreadable face. Not looking at anyone, she marched straight towards Eren and Armin's table.

Jean's eyes were squinted while seeing Mikasa. She was going to perform _his _plan. He wasn't very keen on seeing it, but he was going to see it regardless.

Eren and Armin were both looking pale and tired, pretty much like Marco. Armin was sporting a nice, big bandage on his forehead and Eren had just missed his mouth with his spoon and unknowingly attempted to feed himself through his cheek.

Mikasa left her dishes at their table and faced Eren.

"Eren Jaeger, stand up now."

"Ehh… Mikasa, what is it? I'm tired, you know…"

Her tone was commanding.

"Just do it."

Eren stood up as best he could.

"Fine, what is it?"

She grabbed both of his shoulders.

"Eren, I just want to say…"

She slid her hands down his arms and then, with a sudden step forward…

"ARHRHRHG… Mikasa… I can't breathe!"

…she crushed Eren with her arms.

While Eren was squirming under her grip, she kept repeating in monotone.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry."

"Mikasa, ARGHRHR…I…ARRGHH …I need air."

Jean face flushed bright red from laughing, loud snorts constantly escaping against his will. He was biting his hand trying, absolutely unsuccessfully, to control himself.

"Marco, are you seeing…HAHA…this, she is going to pop his eyes out."

"Dude, not funny...she'll kill him."

Mikasa's grip tightened even more.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry."

"ARHGHGH… what are you…ARRGRHH."

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry."

"You…ARGRH…are forgiven."

She let go of him. Eren quickly stepped back and inhaled super loudly.

"… Are you… insane? Were you trying to kill-"

Mikasa quickly sat at the boy's table.

"Eren, let's have breakfast together."

The exhausted boy then gave to deadly glares; the first one was directed towards Mikasa and the second was directed towards Jean, who was banging his fist against the table and biting his mouth while laughing like a little boy.

_What the hell did you tell her Kirschtein?!_

Mikasa noticed Eren was looking at Jean.

"Eren, sit down!"

The tired Eren who was afraid of being shown more sisterly love, like a puppy, obeyed.

As soon as that happened, Jean began whispering to Marco while still giggling.

"See that… oh my god…hahaha…she's so awesome…ahahah…I love her… hahaha."

"Oh my god, did you just…"

"What?"

"Nothing, forget it."

Jean calmed down a little after a while, though it had been hard for him to do. He took a few more bites from his breakfast and then rested his head on his palm.

He stared at Mikasa with the most sincere and irresistible smile someone had ever seen in him. Mikasa noticed, and only gave him a cold eyes-only glare.

Jean, taken over by an emotion he could not have named, winked at her.

She heard herself gasp. She could have sworn that it was not her intention to stare at him like that.

_Oh my god._

She was blushing madly. She quickly looked away and covered her face. Her brother noticed though.

"Oi Mikasa, what gotten into you now?

"Nothing."

_You are too dense Eren._

Marco now, despite his tiredness, began giggling with his friend too.

"I saw what you just did there, haha."

Jean did mean to sound so smug.

"I know. That was pretty awesome, wasn't it?"

"Yep, it was. She totally likes you."

Again, being smug was a side effect of his happiness.

"I know."

"By the way, have to ask you something now. It will probably make you angry."

Jean frowned at his friend.

"My, my… being under slept really makes you cranky. What is it?"

"So… Operation Spined Heart is over. What's next?"

"Uhh?"

"Do you think we should stop this, like, planning-to-make-her-fall-for-you-thing?"

In those rare instances that Jean became overtaken with passion he could really become someone else.

"Stop planning?! Are you kidding?! I know exactly what I have to do next! Our next plan will consist in-"

Keith Shadis almost broke the door when he snapped it open. Being under slept REALLY made him cranky as well.

"YOU MAGGOTS, LISTEN UP RIGHT NOW."

Everybody looked at him. Marco tried to hide his black eyes with his hand.

"I have are two important announcements! The first one; yesterday we've lost a good portion of our training grounds due to a fire caused by some arson-loving criminals. Worry not; we will catch them and severe punishment will be delivered!"

The trainees began whispering. Marco only hid his face further with his hand.

"The second announcement! As you know, a lot of you maggots will end up joining the Garrison. Therefore, it is critical that you all have extensive knowledge in the usage of defensive cannons. And because the forest is now unusable for our training, you will be stationed at Trost barracks for the next month; you will all have to sleep at daytime, and work the night guard, manning the cannons at the walls."

A few gasps and cheers were heard among the trainees.

"Each cannon will be manned by two trainees. There are a hundred and twenty cannons all along the outer wall of Trost. The pairings selections were based on performance and grades."

Shadis took out a list from his pocket.

"Tius, Zeramuski- Section Z-1."

"Yes, sir!"

"Arlert, Haber- Section Z-2"

"Yes, sir!"

And so, one by one, Shadis began assigning each trainee with a teammate and a section of the wall to man.

"Wagner, Carolina- Section C-1"

"Yes, sir!"

"Bott, Lenz- Section C-2"

"Yes, sir!"

Jean chuckled at the nasty look Ymir gave Marco.

"Blouse, Springer- Section B-2"

"Yes, sir!"

"Braun, Hoover- Section B-1"

"Yes, sir!"

"And now for section A…"

Section "A" was a special one. It's the Section of the wall that covered the main gate of Trost that opened into the outside world.

"Jaeger, Leonhardt- Section A-1"

Eren and Annie looked at each other as they stood up; both with a blank face, albeit for different reasons.

"Yes, sir!"

"Alright, last one… Kirschtein, Ackerman- Section A-2"

Jean looked directly at Shadis and tried his best to erase the huge grin off his face. He failed.

"That's it for now maggots; get ready, because long nights are ahead of you."

Shadis left the cafeteria and Jean sat back down.

"Guess we are both lucky, don't you think Jean?"

"You've said it."

Jean leaned in closer to his friend.

"I was about to tell you what our next plan will consist on."

"What is it?"

"Our next plan will consist in a way to convince Mikasa to join the Military Police with me. We'll figure something out this next month. I will definitely-"

Marco grabbed his face with both hands.

"Here we go again…"

"Hey! What happened to your positive attitude?"

"Left it at the forest while helping my best friend get his woman."

Jean frowned again.

"Give me a break, you cranky freckled."

-x-

_To be continued…_

_**Author notes**__: Oh my god, Jean is going to be spending every night of a month alone with Mikasa, manning cannons. What will happen during that month? What plan will he make? Will he make Mikasa join the MP? Will Marco finally get some sleep?_

_Who knows…_

_Until next time, Adventure Span…_


	15. First Night Shock

Chapter 15

Mikasa stepped into the elevator to get on top of the wall. She was extremely early; night had just fallen on Trost.

Three problems were on her mind.

_No, these are not problems, these are headaches._

The elevator reached the top of the wall with a loud thud.

Wind hit her body and face.

_Damn it, it's freezing._

It was a bone-chilling, dry and powerful wind. The green coat on top of the uniform was not enough to defend yourself from it.

_I can't do anything about it now._

Mikasa buried her nose under the scarf and put the green hood on her head. Now, somewhat protected, she began walking to her right, along the cannon rails, towards her designated area.

_Section A-2, to the left of the gate._

No emotion in her stride, but she did took a second to stare at the infinity of the outside world now enveloped under the shadow of darkness.

She then turned around to look at the immense Trost district, the other shadow covered infinity, in which houses stretched as far as she could see. Only a wall that seemed very small from where she was stopped its gigantic growth.

_Enough sightseeing for now._

After walking past a couple of cannons, she saw her designated small storage house. It was barely big enough for a single person to fit inside with the cannon ammunition.

A couple more steps to the right and there she was. A bigger than most cannon was waiting for her. Greasing its parts was today's task.

She placed her bare hand on the main iron frame.

_Ouch!_

Burning cold iron.

She quickly pulled the hand off.

_The first headache._

Reaching into her pockets to pull out cloth makeshift fingerless gloves, she let out a sigh. A small bucket of grease was on the cannon's feet. She dropped to a knee and grabbed a handful of the thick, viscous black liquid.

_This will be a long night._

With both hands, she began greasing the inner hinges. It was a daunting and time consuming task.

_This is so terribly boring, but I'm used to boring._

After a while, she heard footsteps to her left.

Two trainees fully coated and hooded were walking while getting whipped by the wind.

When they were closer Mikasa saw their faces.

_Eren._

As the two trainees walked past her, Eren waved his hand weakly.

She waved her hand back to then immediately narrow her eyes at Eren's partner.

_That blond bully. My second headache. Damn it… Just my luck._

Mikasa used her fingers to keep spreading grease on the cannon's turning mechanisms. The meticulous nature of the task left her digits sore after a while and, despite the cold, a thin layer of sweat was forming on her forehead.

_Uhh, it's hot!_

When she finished, she stood up and wiped the sweat with the rear part of her palm. She then pulled the scarf down from her face.

She didn't have much time to think. A loud but muffled voice sounded right behind her.

"Oi"

A coated and hooded trainee slightly taller than her had yelled. He was wearing a grey scarf that covered his face.

"…oug….ome…ea!"

The scarf on his face and the whistling hiss of the wind distorted his voice.

"Huh?

"…oug….ome…ea!"

"What?"

The trainee pulled the scarf down from his face, revealing Jean's face.

_Jean Kirschtein, my third headach-_

"I brought you some tea, Mikasa!"

"Oh."

She looked at the steaming mug on his hand, which he immediately offered.

"Thanks."

"Hey, you got grease on you cheek."

His thumb approached her face and delicately touched it with the intention of cleaning it. Mikasa also felt the hidden affection behind that move.

"…don't."

He pulled his hand back.

"Huh?"

"I…I still have to grease a lot."

Mikasa saw that he was still smiling at her, but barely.

_I can't worry about him right now. I have to first excel at cannon usage so I can get teamed up with Eren._

"So partner, it looks like you've already started without me. Let me help you."

"Ehh… no, it's alright I can-"

"Come on, I can't let you work all this-"

"It's okay, just let me. Thank you."

"Oh… okay. If you want me to help, just say the word."

Mikasa once again got on her knees and continued with the greasing.

_I can't get distracted. I will make a mistake if I have him around._

Jean sat on the floor of the wall, facing Mikasa. After a few minutes of being idle, he let out a sigh.

"So… Mikasa, everything good?"

Mikasa barely glanced at him while continuing with her work.

"Yes."

"Anything new to tell me?"

"No."

"Are you feeling okay?"

"Jean I'm busy now."

"Sorry… Eh… you know, I've always wanted to know if you have anything you…kind of love to do."

"Huh?"

"I dunno, something that brings you joy…"

She kept quiet for a few seconds.

Suddenly, an extremely loud cry of pain sounded from their right.

"_AAAHHHHH!"_

It was from the place Eren and Annie were working.

Mikasa's gasp was as loud as the hissing of the ice cold wind. She snapped her head away from the inner mechanisms and turned to look at them.

Before she could think of anything, she felt a hand on her shoulder.

"Don't you worry; I'll go check it out now!"

"But Jean… I can-"

He went running towards section A-1.

_Jean wait…_

When she tried standing up, something tugged strongly at her neck. Her scarf was trapped inside the cannon's trigger mechanism. With her heart on her mouth, she did her best to get it out by forcefully pulling it.

It didn't work.

_Mikasa calm down! You'll rip it! Fuck!_

With her jaw trembling and sweat forming all over her body, she used her grease soaked fingers to try to somehow pull it out.

_Hurry Mikasa! He could be horribly injured and you are here screwing around! You idiot!_

The scarf just wouldn't let loose.

_Damn it! The hell with it!_

She pulled her scarf out of her neck, got away from the cannon, and began running.

_Don't worry Eren, I'm right here!_

She was sweating and her breathing was as frequent as her heartbeat.

_Just wait for me I'll be-_

She stopped running.

Jean was coming towards her with his hand on his pockets and a face of someone so angry that you definitely did not want to talk to.

They looked at each other. She saw that his eyes were tainted by sadness and disappointment.

_Jean…_

"The genius of you brother got grease in his eyes."

She let out an enormous breath and with both hands wiped the sweat off her face. She then saw that her hands were black.

Jean began approaching her. When he got closer, with the same face he was before, Jean spoke in a monotone.

"Mik, your face is covered in grease…"

He pulled out a small handkerchief out of his pocket and began cleaning her face up. He was not smiling.

"Jean…"

She felt compelled to ask.

"…are you okay?"

He smirked at her in an almost unnoticeable way.

"Yeah, well… it's just I thought we were already… forget it. Don't worry about it."

He passed the handkerchief through her forehead.

"Oh… okay."

When he was done with her cheeks, he showed the handkerchief to her. The originally white piece of cloth was now black.

"Ehh… Jean I-"

"If I won't do any work today, can I sleep sitting on the cannon?"

She looked away.

"Guess you can."

He started walking towards their section without saying a word or glancing towards her. She stared at him.

Jean quickly sat against the cold iron frame with his arms folded. His face was dull.

_No, Jean. Please don't hate me._

Mikasa walked towards the cannon. She quickly got on her knees and continued with the horribly annoying greasing.

_I'm sorry partner._

"Mikasa, you didn't answer my question."

"Huh?"

"What brings you joy?"

The lack of things to answer made her heart hurt.

'_Nothing'. I can't say that to him. He'll think I'm… I'm repulsive and weird._

"Jean, I'm not a good person."

"Huh?"

"I'm boring and uninteresting. I know that's true. I though you knew that by now. I'm sorry."

He let out a very profound sigh.

"If you say so…"

He didn't talk for the rest of that night's guard.

As soon as Mikasa finished the greasing, which took quite a long time, she stood up.

Jean was deep asleep, with his head leaned to a side.

_Guess I can't ask you to clean me up now. I'm a mess in every way. You'd probably say no and I wouldn't blame you._

Mikasa cleaned herself up as best she could and sat at the side of the cannon opposite to him. She fell asleep well away from his warm shoulder.

-x-


	16. Knowledge of Wisdom and Bars

Chapter 16

Jean softly kicked the bunk on top of him.

"Marco!"

A drained voice answered.

"What is it?"

"I can't sleep."

"Neither can I. I hate sleeping at daytime."

"I'm feeling restless. There is still a while until our night guard starts. I'll treat you to a beer in the military bar. What do you say?"

Marco let out a soft sigh and jumped down.

"I'll go put on the uniform."

-x-

The bar was empty and dimly lit. The boys sat in two stools and began talking.

Marco was shaking his head as he took a sip from his freshly served beer.

"Christa is insane."

" Oh, Come on."

"I swear. When she's under slept she gets ten times nicer. It's horrifying."

Jean took a sip from his glass while chuckling.

"Is that so?"

"When we finished the cannon maintenance, I sat on a side of cannon to take a well deserved nap. Christa then ruined everything when she came towards me and was like…"

He began imitating her voice.

'_Are you alright Marco?'_

'Yes I am.'

'_Are you sure?'_

'Yes'

'_But you look exhausted.'_

'Well…'

'_You are lying to me. You are not alright.'_

'No, it's just-'

'_You are not hurt?'_

'No, I'm fine.'

'_Is there anything I can do for you?'_

'No thanks.'

'_Do you want some tea?'_

'No, I-'

'_An apple?'_

'No.'

'_Okay… hey Marco… Marco…'_

'…'

'_Marco!'_

'What?'

'_Sorry if I bothered you.'_

'Uhhh… don't worry, just let me-'

'_You know what?'_

'What is it now?'

'_I have an idea that might make you feel better…'_

'Huh?'

'_You should probably get some sleep right now.'_

Jean patted Marco's left shoulder and began laughing with his mouth closed.

Marco smiled.

"Jean, I swear I had to use all my willpower not to throw her off the edge."

"Dude… haha, you are insane as well."

"Haha, maybe. And how was your first night with Mikasa?"

"Oh man."

He drank a good amount of his beer.

"She's ruthless. I mean, I try to be as friendly and helpful as I can but she's still ice cold to me."

"Damn."

"Yeah… I even brought her tea and tried to talk, but to no avail. She's my always distant Mikasa. What concerns me most is not knowing if I really mean something to her. Right now I feel like I don't. Not a single bit."

Marco chuckled at him.

"Jean, don't depress me even more."

"Haha, shut up. I need to ask Armin on what to do next."

"Sure?"

"Don't know, but it seems-"

A very loud hitting sound to his right interrupted him. It was a hand that forcefully pressed a few coins against the bar.

He turned his head to his right .

_What the hell was th-_

"Oi, bartender! Give me three full pints of your strongest apple liquor!"

It was a woman.

Jean eyed her carefully. It was a fit looking brunette. She was obviously in her thirties but her face owned a young person's smile. It was almost childlike.

She was wearing her hair at shoulder length with fringes framing her face and was sporting a bright red shirt with the standard military pants and boots.

The bartender quickly answered her.

"Three full pints? My dear, are you sure?"

"You know me…"

Jean and Marco were discretely staring at her. She sat on the stool that was besides Jean's.

He shrugged at Marco, who was giggling uncontrollably.

"Alright my dear, here they are. Take it easy please."

She looked at the three pints with a devilish smile.

"Yeah, yeah…"

She grabbed two of them; one with each hand, and drained the pint of her right hand in the blink of an eye. She almost had downed it in one big gulp.

"…Ahhhhh… that felt good."

She began quickly attacking the pint held by her left hand.

The throat noises could be heard clearly.

…_gulp…gulp...gulp…gulp…_

Jean and Marco were staring directly; wide eyed both of them.

…_gulp…gulp…gulp…gulp…_

She finished the second pint and left the glass at the bar.

"…Ahhhh…I could do this all day."

Her cheeks were already the same color as her shirt. She grabbed the last pint with her right hand.

For the first time, she noticed the boy's astonished gaze.

She chuckled and raised an eyebrow at them. The boys quickly looked away.

She let out what Jean perceived as an arrogant laugh.

The brunette then turned her body around, leaned her back against the bar and took a sip from her third pint with her legs crossed.

"Hey, you two! You youngsters have never seen a real woman letting loose?"

"Ehh… sorry miss. Never like that." Marco said.

"Well, people usually tell me I'm a bit strange, so that's that. By the way, don't call me miss again."

"Sorry miss."

Jean punched Marco's arm lightly.

The woman smiled.

"Now young boys, be honest with your drinking partner. Tell me what are your grievances."

Jean raised his eyebrows.

"Huh?"

"You know… the reason you are both here drowning your sorrows."

Jean looked at Marco who nodded at him.

_Why not?_

"Girls. We don't understand them, and we don't know how to make them love us."

"Pfff…"

The woman laughed with such exaggerated gestures Jean started leaning away.

"HAHAHAH… That? HAHAHA… you had to be boys… HAHAH"

"Miss?"

"HAHA… well, it's your lucky day…"

She leaned towards Jean with a silly and enthusiastic smile almost unseen in adults.

_Talk about spunky girls._

"Biology is my area of expertise, friend. And let me tell you…"

She raised her index finger and raised her voiced in a mock serious way.

"…girls are the most complex beings that I've ever come across in my studies."

"Does that mean there is no hope for us?"

That devilish smile of the older woman was starting to get Jean's chest quite warm.

"On the contrary my dear friend, I've managed to make out every detail that hides in the depths of the female mind. It took me many years of analyzing. I will tell you every secret I know of."

"Awesome!"

She leaned her back more into the bar. Her mock serious voice intensified.

"First off, you have got to understand this. Women love to be lied upon."

"Huh? That doesn't sound good."

"They like to believe in your words, even if they are not the true. They love believing in your certainty."

Marco spoke up.

"Miss, please don't tell Jean that lying is good. He is way too likely to end locked up."

"Shuddup."

The three of them shared a small laugh.

"But really, feel free to lie to your girl. Whenever you want to make her happy, lie to her. And then make her believe you. She'll love to believe in your lies."

"Seriously?"

"As a scientist, I must say… there is now doubt about it."

"You are a scientist?"

She was very relaxed about herself.

"Haha, sorta. It gets tangled up with my job in the military. I also occupy very important roles."

"Oh."

"So, as I was saying, don't forget to lie. And then, you gotta be on the lookout for… 'The expression'. Whenever your girl seems like she's ignoring you or looks hurt, forcefully pull her close to your body and tell her you love her. It's one of the things the female mind cannot resist."

"Won't all that cause fights and trouble?" Jean asked.

She grinned immensely while answering.

"We females love fights and trouble."

"Oh. Wow. Thanks for letting me know."

Marco suddenly spoke up with his usual display of caring.

"By the way Miss, what are _your_ grievances?"

The question drained a bit of life out of the woman. Her voice softened.

"Well… about that, you know… stuff happens and it's complicated but-"

"Oi, shitty glasses, what the hell are you doing here?"

A short black haired man with a mean look in his face had entered the bar and yelled at the woman. He was wearing a military uniform and a Survey corps jacket.

The woman turned to look at him.

"Don't call me that. I'm not even wearing them right now. I have the right to be pretty, you know?"

"Look Hange, I've heard what happened and I know it was not intentional but-"

The short man took a look at the three pints.

"My god, how much have you had?!"

The devilish smile Jean was fond of was back on her face.

"I had a feeling you would be looking for me."

"I'm taking you back to the base, NOW!"

"I'm not going anywhere until I finish my pint. Let me be happy for tonight. Besides, I even made some friends."

Jean and Marco smiled at the short guy, earning a grim look from him.

"Come on, let's go."

The man tried to grab her wrist, but the woman pulled her arm away quickly. She then dipped her fingers in the liquor of her pint and started splashing alcohol onto him.

" HAHA! Yush! Yush! Go away Levi! HAHA!"

The man covered himself and stepped back.

"Very mature, Hange! Very appropriate of a squad leader!"

Marco and Jean looked at each other.

"Squad leader?!" They both said at the same time.

"Yush! Yush!"

"Fine, do what you want shitty glasses. You better be at the base tomorrow morning or I'll kill you three."

"Pfff…"

Jean and Marco thought the remark coming from the short guy was awfully funny and started laughing hard. Hange laughed with them.

"Yeah, Levi, kill us three. HAHA… could you also clean my room while you are sulking at the base? HAHA"

Levi hissed at her.

"Drunk smartass."

He left the bar.

Jean touched Marco's arm while laughing.

"HAHA… This guy's great…HAHA."

He then turned his head to look at Hange.

"Miss, are you seriously a squad leader from the Survey Corps?"

The brunette pointed her thumb at her chest.

"Squad leader from the Survey Corps and titan researcher extraordinaire, Hange Zoe!"

"Wow!"

She gulped down what was left of her third pint.

Marco then told her with a face full of admiration.

"Wow miss, you are amazing!"

"Haha, thanks! Now kids, this old hag has to go to the toilet-"

When she tried standing up, her knees gave up.

She fell straight on the ground, almost unconscious. The boys quickly stood up in her aid.

"Miss Hange!"

-x-

The headquarters of the Survey Corps were located in the middle of a small park which Marco and Jean had just entered. They were dragging an unconscious Hange towards her base grabbing one shoulder each.

"Hey Jean, this was awesome."

Hange let out an unconscious burp.

"Haha, Yeah, yeah."

When they were closer to the base, Hange started showing signs of life.

"Ehh…Sorry to make you do this, kids. I usually don't drink this much."

"No worries Miss." Jean said.

"Hey, it's…. alright. I can… walk."

"Sure?"

"Yeah… yeah."

She hastily walked a couple of steps without much trouble, but in the midst of darkness, she didn't notice a tree.

"Careful, there is a tree!"

It was too late, she tripped on a tree root and fell straight on her face.

"Miss Hange!"

She got up and put a hand up to stop Marco.

"It's alright."

Hange was a blank. Not a single muscle was tensing up on her face. Only its narrowed eyes showed a trace of life from her.

Hange turned to face the thin tree trunk. Her tone deep and heavy.

"Okay Mister Tree…"

She placed one foot on the trunk and leaned her weight into it.

"…it seems like your goal today is to make my life worse. You've just made me fall on my face. Well, let me educate you on what is that we do at the Survey Corps. Getting titan test subjects is an important mission for us. Sadly, it is a very dangerous task. Many soldiers die on those missions and it's often in vain. "

Jean shrugged at Marco, looking confused.

"Yesterday was an exception. We somehow managed to capture an aberrant for the first time, but not before it crushed five of my men and ate another two. I can still smell their blood on my clothing. Picking up their mangled corpses to give them to their families was also a task we had to do."

She took the foot off the trunk. Jean saw that Marco was starting to get pale.

"So, you would think that's enough to throw me off, Mister Tree. But you would be mistaken. Sacrifices are painful but usual. Now, it was time for me to do my magic. I have all mankind breathing on my neck; hoping that I somehow use my head to find a way we can all survive this mess. Simple task… eh?"

Her tone got tainted by fury.

"So yeah… I had an aberrant captured. I was tired and hadn't had any sleep. But the task couldn't wait. It was crucial to find out if aberrant titans have something on their necks that made them different…"

_Hange…_

"I was cutting his skin slowly observing with all my energy every detail I could. But you know what suddenly happened, Mister Tree?"

_Miss Hange, don't…_

"I slipped! And the spear I was holding sliced the neck of the titan! Its body began evaporating, along with the sacrifices of my men."

_No… please don't…_

"This is where you come in Mister Tree! This is where your arrogance will cause your complete demise! You have dared to make me fall. Haven't you noticed, you idiot!? I've already failed my men! I've already failed humanity! And I have also failed as a scientist! AND NOW YOU DARE TO MAKE ME FALL?!"

_Please stop…_

"SCREW YOU, YOU STUPID USLESS TREE!"

Marco and Jean stepped back. Their limbs were like stone.

The shin kick she gave the tree trunk resounded all throughout the park with a loud _bang. _It left a mark on the bark but the kick hurt the young soldiers the most.

"SEVEN…"

_Bang._

"_..._PEOPLE…"

_Bang._

"…DIED…"

_Bang._

"…ONLY TO HAVE A FUCK UP LIKE _ME_ RUIN EVERYTHING!"

_BANG._

That kick shook the ground and echoed through the small park. Something cracked. The falling leaves that rained on the ground were the only things that showed any movement.

Silence.

Silence and Hange's hitched breathing.

She then gripped her face with her hands with a great amount of strength.

"Seven friends died in vain. No, no, no, no! NO!"

In the midst of her despair, she felt someone get a tight hold of her. It was Jean.

"Miss Hange, please stop! Keep it together! You are just in a bad mood because of the liquor!"

"Just leave me here, I'm hopeless."

"Miss, you are a squad leader of the Survey Corps and also a scientist. You've got to be proud of yourself. Everyone makes mistakes and there is no way such an amazing woman like you can be hopeless. I know you can do better. I know you are smart enough to save us all."

Hange was still looking gloomy.

"I know I can trust you with our future, Miss."

She snapped her head up.

"You know… that you can trust me?"

"I'm totally sure that I can."

Hange meticulously observed every feature of Jean's face which beamed with certainty.

She then smiled weakly at him.

"You are such a good liar. If you hadn't only met me an hour ago, I would have actually believed you."

Jean, much to Marco's confusion, grinned at her.

"I'm a fast learner. See, now you are feeling better. You were right after all."

Hange could not stop herself from laughing like a child.

"Oh my god…hahaha"

"Miss Hange, please love believing my lie."

"Hahahaha, my god, who are you kid? Hahaha"

Jean let her go, took a step back and saluted her with a fist to his heart.

"I'm Jean Kirschtein, from Trost, sir!"

"Jean, you know haha… with those brains, you'd make an awesome squad leader at the Survey Corps. I hope to see you there one day."

"But miss, I want to join…"

Marco patted Jean's shoulder and winked at him. Jean got it.

"What?"

"Nothing. Let's get you to your base before that midget kills us all. Besides, we still have a night guard at the wall."

Hange burped quite loudly. Marco laughed silently.

"Alright kids, time to take care of the drunken old hag."

Marco grabbed her underneath one of her shoulders.

"Miss, please, you are still pretty young."

"You too are just a treat…ehh."

"I'm Marco."

"Marco, hope to see you as well in the Corps. If you can make me smile when I'm sad, which the strongest human soldier finds hard to do, then you can surely save mankind."

"Haha, thanks Miss."

Jean grabbed her other shoulder.

"Alright let's go, we're just a few steps away."

When they finally arrived at the door, Marco and Jean turned around to leave.

"Hey you two, wait!"

"Yeah?"

The women spoke to them with a motherly voice

"I'm so sorry for what you saw. I'm not always like this. What I'm about to tell you will help you with your girl."

"Okay."

She pulled elastic out of her pocket and tied her hair in a ponytail. She then took out her glasses and adjusted its straps on her head.

"We girls, often times, take much more pressure that we can usually handle, but are never allowed to show our pain because of that. We need help but we are never allowed to say it. Always keep that in mind."

With her index finger, she pushed her glasses up.

"Understood?"

The two boys smiled as they saluted her.

"Yes sir!"

Before leaving, Jean felt that he needed to ask her something.

"Miss Hange, is there anything we can do to help you?"

Hange smiled at Jean.

"No, I'm alright."

-x-

Marco and Jean were going up the wall in the elevator.

"Jean, this night has been insane."

"What are you talking about? The night is still far from over."

"Are you going to take what the Miss said seriously?"

"Of course I am. Armed with this knowledge, I finally stand a chance up there."

"Miss Hange has created a monster. God help us all."

Jean playfully elbowed his friend.

"Shuddup."

-x-

_To be continued…_


	17. Just, Brave and Silly

Chapter 17

"If you don't allow me to work with you tonight, I'm going to throw myself off the edge."

Jean was dead serious.

"Huh?!"

Saying that Mikasa was shocked would be an understatement.

"I didn't come all the way up here to this shitty cold weather to be useless."

"You didn't… need to say that kind of stuff."

Jean raised an eyebrow.

"So, is that a yes?"

A frustrated grunt came out of Mikasa.

"Is that a yes?"

"Yes!"

"Awesome! Now, where is that damn grease?"

And that's the way the night started for her.

_My god, what is up with him?_

Face full of glee, he calmly walked past her. He wasn't at all bothered by the wind or cold that froze everything and everyone.

If she wasn't mistaken, she had also heard him humming.

He crouched behind the cannon. It was the only place besides the storage house that offered protection against the weather.

With his right hand, he grabbed an unnecessary amount of grease and splashed it carelessly on the right side of the cannon's smaller hinges. His humming and smiling and happiness never stopping as he tainted everything not supposed to be tainted with black fluid.

Mikasa couldn't let this disaster keep going. She crouched underneath the cannon and placed a tight-squeezing hand on his shoulder.

"Stop…"

Jean gave her a quick, 'I'm barely listening' glance while still humming.

"…you are doing it all wrong." She said.

Jean ignored her and continued with his untidy and gleeful greasing.

_Oh, so this is your revenge… Why are you always like this?_

Her sigh was meant to be a signal for him, which he again, ignored. She had to take matters into her own hands now.

"Look…"

She dipped her fingerprints in grease and slid herself right beside him; the sides of their bodies were experiencing contact over their grease stained coats.

"…It's all about being delicate and adding just enough. Watch me."

"Oh… okay."

_Alright Mikasa, focus and show him how it's done._

With perfect coordination in her hands she delicately traced her fingers over the metal. Every bolt, every gear, every mechanism was softly caressed by the delicate motions of her digits, painting them with grease the same way a masterpiece is painted. Her eyes were strongly focused on every minuscule detail.

The movements were all flawless. Her mind completely consumed on the task at hand. Perfect is a heavy-loaded word but Jean wouldn't doubt using it to describe her.

When she was finished, Mikasa turned her head towards him.

"See, that's the way it's-"

His wide open eyes, light blush on his cheeks and mouth slightly gapping took her by surprise. Wasn't he ignoring her?

"Mikasa, that was… incredible."

Her eyes looked away without her consent.

_Always ironic, aren't you Jean? _

"I'm just working. It's nothing special."

"You do it perfectly… I love seeing you do it. But I guess you already knew that."

He smiled.

"Can I see some more?"

She hated that her chest felt so warm at those words, so she refused to look at him. She turned slightly away from him

"I love the way you are always focused and are always worried and… it's just… I think you-"

"Don't talk. I'm busy."

_I bet he just wants to laugh at me when he sees me believing him. _

Mikasa brought herself some comfort by placing her knees on her chest and hugging herself with them.

She dared to look at him with only her eyes. A quick glance to get some information out of him. She immediately regretted it.

Jean's eyes stabbed at her and they were not accompanied by a smile. It was a face of determination. It was the face of a killer.

She tried, but was unable to match his power. Mikasa looked away.

_What the hell was tha-_

Two arms took a tight hold of her waist before finishing the thought. Mikasa felt herself getting pulled backwards and immediately getting pressed against a body and her head resting on a collar bone.

Only a small gasp left her mouth.

Her arms instinctively went to reach for the two arms that held her, though that move was not panic driven. Her arms, almost reluctantly, ended up resting on top of his.

Her thoughts were suddenly stopped by his touch. Thinking was unimportant and inconsequential. Being held just… it just felt _that_ good.

What Jean said next did not startle her because of the particular words he chose, but because of how intimate his warm breath felt; the feeling exponentially increased by the tight hold on her body.

"I love you."

No better words came out of her than,

"But I'm covered in grease."

Okay… saying that was stupid, really stupid. But it seemed he didn't mind in the slightest.

"Haha, really?"

He always jokes with her feelings. That's just the way he is.

"That's too bad Mikasa…"

Jean lightly squeezed her waist and pressed her even more tightly against his body. It was warm. Now, _this _felt even better.

Who cares if what he said is only a joke from a careless trainee?

Mikasa relaxed her head and rested it even more on his collarbone. That sigh she let out was not supposed to mean anything, it just came out naturally. She rested herself in the comfort of his arms for one, maybe two or three minutes. Again, he didn't seem to care.

He finally spoke.

"Mikasa, I'm serious…"

It's not hard to ruin something beautiful with words.

"I'm Courageous trainee; I wrote you that letter and I meant every word I wrote and- "

"I already knew th-"

"I know that you knew that. You're smarter than me. So, what I'm really asking you… is to…"

"Jean…"

"Look… I'm not even feeling nervous… I just…ehhh…"

_What is up with him?_

"What?"

"Be my girlfriend Mikasa."

It's also not hard to embellish something dull with words.

"I-I…I don't know."

"Do you like me?" He said.

"I… I think you are a good person."

"That's nice to hear. Thank you."

Words can also be used to bring surprises.

"Jean, I just… ehh… besides, there are a lot of girls that think you are… great."

"Oh."

"I… I don't have a family. I have friends. My friends _are_ my family. Do you want to…ehh…"

"Yeah? Say it Mikasa."

"... just be my friend?"

Words can sometimes be hard to interpret.

"Is there anything that is stopping you from being my girlfriend?"

"Yes."

"What?"

"I'm… scared."

Her downward glare was starting to worry him.

"Well. You know what…"

He rested his head on hers and blew slightly on her hair.

"… I am too. I-I will never show that to you, but I'm very scared and nervous right now."

"Huh?"

Words can be used to build empathy.

"I'm afraid that you think I'm… ehh… I don't know, something bad of me. I half expected this conversation to end up in a fight." He said.

"Oh."

"But I really want to be your friend. You'll then be my family. I'm happy with that…"

Words can make people smile.

"Okay."

"So Mikasa, we're friends now, right?"

"It would seem that way."

He squeezed her waist.

"I like, no, I love holding you like this. I feel like I'm holding you like a baby. It makes me feel warm."

She didn't say anything in response.

It was weird talking to him while being held up like that. It was the first time someone had dared to do it. She was not very sure on what she should do next. Worst of all, he kept quiet. Damn him and damn his attitude. It was obnoxious. The silence was literally killing her. If he only knew how nervous she felt right now...

He finally talked after what it seemed like a small eternity to her.

"Well… ehh… I know that we are now friends and all, but still… I need to know. I'm sorry, but I have to ask."

"What?"

"Can I kiss you?"

He probably felt that shiver that came out of her.

"I..."

"No one is watching. I won't tell anyone. No one will ever know. Just two seconds."

"No, I-I can't…"

_My-my first kiss?! No, no, calm down Mikasa! Get off him… invent some excuse. Figure something out! _

"…I really don't think we-"

His grip on her waist tightened and he began giving her small, friendly tugs.

"Please, you'd make me so happy."

_I hate you Jean! Why are you like this?!_

"Please."

Mikasa let out a long and profound sigh.

But she had to learn that meanings behind long and profound sighs are open to different interpretations. Jean chose the interpretation he wanted the most.

He delicately grabbed her face and leaned in with his eyes semi closed.

Being paralyzed like that was not fair for Mikasa. But fairness is nonexistent in love and war. The ones who win are the ones who fight for it.

She instinctively closed her lips and braced herself. She shivered again when she felt contact.

_It's just… pressure on my lips. Warm breath on my cheeks. Nothing… nothing more._

A second passed. He sealed his eyes shut.

Two seconds passed. She sealed her eyes shut in response.

Three seconds passed. A possible heart attack was worrying her.

Four seconds passed. He held her even tighter against his frame,

Five seconds passed. The heart attack concern went away.

Six seconds passed. It felt better. Yeah… just better_._

Seven seconds passed. This felt _nice. _Yeah… just nice.

Eight seconds passed. He smells nice too.

Nine seconds passed…

… _NEED SOME AIR!_

She pulled away with a huge gasp.

Jean also pulled away.

His smile was making her slight panting for breath a little more uncomfortable than it should. He was still holding her.

Mikasa looked away until her breathing was normal again. It probably took about a minute. She just felt so... weird and foreign.

_Damn it!_

Now she had to make sense out of all of this and talk with him. Or maybe not.

_Damn it!_

Keeping quiet would be the most reasonable course of action. They were only teammates. Maybe, and only just recently, friends. Emotions should not carry any relevance on her life decisions. Being someone's girlfriend for the first time is a frightening experience. It is an irresponsible thing to do in the military and it's also irresponsible towards her brother.

Jean could not change that reality, no matter how hard his words, actions, letters and kisses wanted to make her think otherwise.

Now, with her mind clear, she dared look at him. Hard to do against the face of smug contentment he was showing her after that unwanted kiss.

"Jean…"

"Yeah?"

"I'm only your friend. Nothing more."

His smile didn't disappear in the least bit but he did look away.

"Mikasa, I get it. Don't worry. I will only be your friend from now on. I'm really happy regardless."

"Oh…"

_He's got something on his mind. He's planning something._

"By the way, I'm in dire need of help from a friend."

_I knew it!_

"For what?"

"I need to do some stuff in Trost. I just need to set a few things straight and I need a friend to come with me. I'll go in our day off from the night guard."

"What about asking Marco?"

"Ha, good luck getting Marco to wake up early. It's damn near impossible."

"Our day off is two days from now, right?"

He nodded.

Mikasa then pushed herself away from his arms. She then turned around and faced him.

"Jean, I will help you. I'll go to Trost with you. But you've got to promise something."

"Huh?"

"I've already told you that we are only friends. Please, don't try anything on me. Please."

Jean nodded with much enthusiasm.

"Okay. I wasn't going to try anything on you."

Mikasa looked away.

"I don't believe you."

"Your company is more than enough for me."

He always did that sort of thing to her. That's just the way he is.

"Anyways Mikasa…"

What a beautiful, honest and warm smile Jean has on this cold day.

"…teach me how to do that thing with the grease again. I'm feeling exited."

-x-

_To be continued…_


End file.
